That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore

Brunch in Edinburgh, every day for a Month...

2009-04-23T06:40:00.000-07:00

Just when life seems as weird, twisty and utterly, unfathomably complicated enough, someone goes and offers me an Edinburgh show.

A proper one, in a proper studio space.

I know. No-one was more shocked than me.

It's been a pretty intense week of gigging and trying to write, hence the lack of Bloggage...well,, okay I probably could have fitted in a blog or two, but that would be failing to account for my pitiful self motivation and built in Inertia. Friday saw me performing Poetry at the brilliant, brilliant, BRILLIANT Bingo Masters Break Out, in which all the acts have to do Karaoke. I did 'You Give Love a Bad Name' and the room was SLAIN. Saturday brought with it Miow Kacha, a cabaret night based on Fatherhood in which I performed a slightly edited version of this routine, as well as dusting off 'Gods Cock' just to see if I could remember it. Both went down really well and I went home quite chuffed with myself. Which was quickly punctured on Sunday Night when I did the Amused Moose Laugh Off audition stage and didn't even get through to the next round.

This was no huge surprise...we were only allowed to do a minute and a half, and I try really hard to write self-contained 5 minute sets that have a beginning, middle and end...thus making quite hard to strip out the punch lines and boil the whole thing down. Still, the laugh rate was depressingly low.

And just when everything seemed glum, Tuesday happened. At the Saturday night event, I'd got talking to the father of one of the organisers -who had performed a piece himself-, a rather nice and impressive gentleman who it turns out is Artistic Director for Off West End Theatres and happened to have a gap in his Edinburgh schedule, which he was impressed enough to offer to me. Which was quite flattering.

Okay, I know, I'd never attempt to do an hour show myself. I'm not ready...I'm quite far from ready. I'm closer to Alpha Centuri than I am for doing a successful hour of comedy, and besides who would pay to see me? BUT the idea of that available space proved too tempting, so on I emailed pitching him a mixed-bag showcase of new talent which I would head up. The slot is 11.30 in the morning, so I very quickly wrote a pitch for a 'Brunch' themed show mixing stand up, poetry and musical acts. Which he liked. Deal is done, all is confirmed, I'm going to Edinburgh.

Which of course raises a list of things I need to do.

1) Write and cast an hour of Comedy
2) Find a way of driving people to it at 11.30am at the Edinburgh Fringe
3) Find a way of surviving in Edinburgh for a month.

The pretty stonkingly amazing Rob Auton is already on-bored to fulfill the poetry quotiant. I'm pretty sure it's going to be called 'Comedy Brunch Buffet, because I can't think of a better title.

I'm very excited indeed, although frankly, the panic is beginning to set in. Just a touch.

Daddy Issues

2009-04-17T07:25:00.000-07:00

Here's an interesting challenge...I've been asked to perform at the Meow Kacha caberet night this Saturday, (being held at the Scooterworks, 132 Lower Marsh, Waterloo, London SE1 7AE if you fancied popping along), the event is titled 'These Be The Verses' and the theme is fatherhood and relationships... meaning I had to write somethign brand new, reflecting something unique about my relationship with my Dad. It's been quite a tricky ride, because I kept getting sidetracked by emotional baggage, and though I'd love to be the kind of comic who can talk about weightier personal issues with wit and warmth, I'm not quite there yet. That said, this is the kind of comic I want to be so it was worth having a crack at. Below is my work-in-progree first draft, I thought it might be interesting. It needs more jokes, and the ended will probably change -it doesn't quite ring true enought for me yet- but It's a start...

Christmas 1990, and my 4 year old sister has just got the most amazing Christmas present ever from her Daddy. Big blue eyes are shining from beneath blonde curls, her little mouth locked in an awestruck 'O'. It's a whole toy Kitchen, and it's literally twice her height, complete with plastic fruit and a breakfast bar, a coffee pot, and real cereal packets. It is 5ft by 2ft of plastic domestic joy, and it comes in a cardboard box that is, if anything, even more exciting than its contents for sheer potential playability. The thing is, we're poor. Really really quite poor. We'd lost our house in the recession...which if anything makes this story bitingly relevant, rather than fleeting nostalgia...and we're living in a rented 2 up 2 down in Leicestershire. But that was okay, because like so many of that years gifts the Kitchen had, to quote my Dad, "fallen off the back of a truck". I'd got a Liverpool shirt, as I was in one of my periodic phases of denial about hating football. I hate football, It's shit, but it made Dad happy that I tried. That came off the back of a lorry too. I forget what my brother got, but it was probably truck-back-based in origin as well, as was most of our furniture.

We had a lot of things that had apparently fallen off of the back of Lorry's. It was sort of natural actually...Dad was a lorry driver, a lorry driver with slightly dodgy ethics when it came to his load.

Well,I say Lorry driver...that's what he did. Technically, In the eyes of the law he was unemployed. But then my Dad always had this knack of claiming benefits while still maintaining full time work, it was a knack he had developed into a master art form of deception. We were all drilled with strict instructions that if anyone ever called the house asking for our Dad we were under absolutely no circumstances to tell anyone he was at work.

There's an interesting argument about role models. How can you grow up with a decent grasp of what's right and wrong when your father-figure's take on the law is so morally grey? Sure we were poor, genuinely struggling. We'd had to move in with my grandparents for a month, we'd had to sell the car and by a cheaper one, we were living by the skin of our teeth. Dad was only doing what he could to support his family, surely? If a man steals a loaf of bread to feed his starving family, is that wrong? What if they're not actually starving, just a bit peckish? And okay if a man steals a loaf of bread he'll feed himself for his day, but let him steal a Kitchen and he'll feed himself and his family for a lifetime. And, okay, maybe that Kitchen is made of plastic and aimed at 4 year old girls but the principle still applies. It's sound.

We never felt what Dad was doing was wrong. Our Mum was and indeed still is quite a moral person, and took great pains to instill in us a strong sense of right and wrong. Instead it felt cheeky. It felt like he was getting away with it. He was Del Boy. He was Arthur Daily, playing the system to get what he wanted and winning. It wasn't wrong, it was about bending the rules, often to a state of elasticity that defied conventional physics.

It all seemed a bit of a joke somehow, not quite real. I remember being 14 and hearing on the news that a Timberland clothing warehouse in Nottingham had been burgled and thousands of £'s worth of merchandise had been stolen. This wasn't a massive shock to me.... Dad had had me selling Timberland Jumpers at my school for a £10 a pop for the last week. I knew he had nothing to do with the robbery itself though. He skirted the edges of other peoples crimes. He'd gone out "to see a man about a dog" and came back with some jumpers. He always knew a man who knew a man, that would invariably end up with my Brother and I going out with him on a freezing saturday morning selling car covers, or Christmas hampers, or on one occasion boxes of sweets that had literally come out of a big box from the tip that Dad had been delivering too.

The thing is, despite all of his faults, as a child I completely idolised my Dad, in a way you only can with someone whose hardly ever there and whose faults you're largely blind too. I envied how easily he could make friends, how easy going he was, and also how fearless. I'd go to school, or talk to my Mum, and I'd learn about right and wrong, but this wonderful person I knew became a voice in the back of my head, saying 'you don't always have to do it their way'. I learned the black and white, but Dad taught me there were shades of grey.

As an adult, I've hardly become Del Boy myself. I don't know a Man that knows a man. Most of the men I know don't know any Men at all. And I know that Dad's point of view was slightly warped. He wasn't trust worthy and so never really trusted anyone, where as I'm naieve and trusting to the point that it can often be pathetic. But I like to think that some of the best of him has ended up in me. He's always there, as a little voice in my head. Literally sometimes, when he rings me and tells me how to live my life. He's not changed, only last year he turned up at Mums saying "I've got a boot full of meat, do you want some?". Fundamentally I play by the rules, pay my taxes, and get by. But I'd like to think that on some level, I've never forgotten that sometimes you can bend the rules. That somewhere is a man that knows a man who can get you what you need. That sometimes somethings can fall off the back of a truck and not be missed. Dad can get away with it, and if it makes a little girl smile at a plastic kitchen, it's probably okay.

Planet Of The Dead: Predictions...the debrief

2009-04-13T15:35:00.000-07:00

In this post on Saturday I oh-so-smart-arsely tried to predict what was going to happen in Doctor Who. Here's how I did...

1) They will be a subtle but ominous foreshadowing, ala Medusa Cascade, unrelated to the plot
Correct! Liz from Teachers, who was prone to the odd prediction -and apparently more accurate than me- weaved some mystic mumbo jumbo about something that was returning, and someone who'd knock four times. She also echoed the Ood back in series 4 by saying that his "song is ending". Ominous foreshadowing a-go-go.

2) This episode will be a bit too RTD-lite, ala Voyage Of The Damned
And it was! I enjoyed it more than 'Voyage...' though.

3) Michelle Ryan will snog David Tennant for a spurious reason not related to romance. This maybe something to do with enzymes, genetic transfers, or hiding. She will clearly fancy him, he will explain it's all a bit complicated
Half true. She did snog him, but there was no pretense about it. He seemed to quite enjoy the experience too. But then DT is the kissing Doctor. William Hartnell would never had got away with it.

4) I will fancy Michelle Ryan a lot more than I previously have
Sort of.

5) There will be some veiled camp reference about Captain Jack.
Wrong.

6) There will be a joke about Cliff Richard/ Summer Holiday/ Blakey/ Orrible Olive/ Holiday on the Buses
Okay, no. I think they missed a trick here though. I bet there was one in an earlier draft. Confidential used 'Summer Holiday' as a soundtrack. so thats half a point surely?

7) There will be a joke at the expense of London Transport. Possibly somehing about routemasters.
Another missed trick.

8) Lee Evans character will be wacky and annoying.
As wrong as I could be. I actually fould Malcome to be really sweet.

9) There will be a reference to Star Wars/Laurence of Arabia/Dune
Wrong again, but James Strong does mention David Lean in the commentary.

10) There will be an Eastenders reference at Michelle Ryans expense
Thanksfully no.

Clearly i'm not as clever or as geeky as I make out. Opinions?

Predictions for tonights Doctor Who

2009-04-11T09:07:00.000-07:00

I actually wrote this for a private email, but I thought I'd make it public and stand by it...this is my ten predictions for Planet Of The Dead:

1) They will be a subtle but omnious foreshadowing, ala Medusa Cascade, unrelated to the plot
2) This episode will be a bit too RTD-lite, ala Voyage Of The Damned.
3) Michelle Ryan will snog David Tennant for a spurious reason not related to romance. This maybe something to do with enzymes, genetic transfers, or hiding. She will clearly fancy him, he will explain it's all a bit complicated
4) I will fancy Michelle Ryan a lot more than I previously have
5) There will be some veiled camp reference about Captain Jack.
6) There will be a joke about Cliff Richard/ Summer Holiday/ Blakey/ Orrible Olive/ Holiday on the Buses
7) There will be a joke at the expense of London Transport. Possibly somehing about routemasters.
8) Lee Evans character will be wacky and annoying.
9) There will be a reference to Star Wars/Laurence of Arabia/Dune
10) There will be an Eastenders reference at Michelle Ryans expense.

Bible Bashing Britain

2009-04-08T09:29:00.000-07:00

Right, most regular readers to this blog are clearly rubbish. Did I not state, quite clearly, the other week, "Any days I don’t update this please send me a long email telling me I’m a wanker who can’t stick at anything." It's right here! As it was only one person contacted me to point out my epic fail. In my defense, no-one says you have to Blog every day. This is the best Blog I've ever read and is only updated a couple of times a week. So there.

There's always excuses isn't there? Always something to blame. I'm going to plump for that old chestnut of busyness, and it's almost sort of true. I've been gigging the last three nights, which is nice and makes me feel like I'm actually getting somewhere with all of this, been attempting to write a brand new 5 minute set for the upcoming gigs, and have been attempting to watch both series of Vic Reeves Big Night Out from beginning to end. It's all kept me rather busy.

The gigs have been really nice, especially since Sundays gig at 1 Mighty Craic in Belsize Park, and Monday's Soho Comedy Club gig, were actually infront of proper stand up audiences as opposed to open mic crowds. I don't mind the new-act circuit, but my stuff always seems to go better at the more established clubs. Maybe the pro's make me up my game. It was last nights gig (an unplanned return to Party Piece in Stoke Newington...I'm back there on the 21st if anyone's interested) that finally jolted my return to blogging. I bumped into another stand up on the open-mic circuit, whose name I shall keep to myself for now, who -for the second time- took me to task on the Bible-based material he'd seen me perform before.

(I should point out at this point that I've already shelved this particular material for now...not because I don't like it, but because I wanted to refresh my set and every month or so I chuck the whole lot out and start again)

As I've said before I quite like getting critique from my bigger brothers and sisters on the circuit. I'm very much a new act, still within my first 20 gigs, and need all the help I can get, so I'll always listen gratefully. The comic in question told me -and this is paraphrasing from memory-

"There is virtually no point in doing stuff about the bible or religion in this country. No body cares, in America you can get away with it, but over here no-one cares and when a comic talks about the bible I just switch off".

He went on to point out that Bill Hicks had already said it all, and really even that had dated now. This is the set in question:

Marc's stand up gig in stoke newington march 4th
Uploaded by teamwireless

I quite like it, it stands out from a lot of other peoples stuff at my level, and I think is a lot closer to the comic that I want to be. I don't think I'm quite good enough yet to pull off this type of work, but it's definitely what I'm aiming towards. Now...how should I take the advice to drop this line of comedy all together? After all, it's coming from someone whose done a lot more gigs than I have? Should I listen? Are my instincts wrong? Does the UK really want to hear jokes about religion, or is it genuinely outdated now?

It's true that you don't tend to hear all that much biblical based shenanigans on the new act stand up circuit, (with the exception of the brilliant Matt Parker who does a bit on the same obscure bible reference as I do, by compete coincidence. I have a sneaking suspicion his is funnier than mine too) although I've never thought this was because there wasn't call for it. I thought it's because it's hard to write in an accessible and funny way without causing offense. or at least too much offense. After all there is a long tradition in UK comedy of poking fun of the seemingly serious and self important, of deflating the sacred with profanities (see what I did there?) and thumbing our noses at the pompous. The Bible, with its weight of tradition, dry language and association with a reactionary outlook is a prime target, a representation of the old fashioned and the dull. It's very tempting to take these very familiar shapes and phrases and spin them into jokes, and some of the very best comics have done just this. Observe Stewart Lee here as Jesus:

Lee is an absolute master at this type of material. His intelligence and knack for pointing out the absurdities in the everyday mean he has been drawn back to the Bible throughout his career. A classic routine in his Stand Up Comedian takes apart attitudes to blasphemy in a hugely skilled way, but even back in 1995 he and Richard Herring were using basic biblical principles for really very silly laughs.

Even so, Stewart Lee (famously only the 41st Best Stand Up) hardly rates as a household name. Maybe the advice I'm being given is more to do with being as acceptable as possible, rather than the more alienating affect of 'alternative' comics? Mind...Eddie Izzard is very famous, isn't he?

Throughout his career Izzard has been doing exactly what I've been doing, finding bits of the Bible that don't quite sit right and poking the absurdities at your face until you can't miss them. He's covered everything from St Paul's letters to the corinthians to The Pope. His most recent show, Stripped, takes potshots at God all the way through, notably Creationsim.

I can keep going:

Dylan Moran...

Ross Noble...

Rowan Atkinson...

Andrew O'Neil...
The moment The Pope Learns the Truth about God: by Andrew O'Neil

Glenn Wool...

And I could go on.

I suppose the argument could be that most of these comics aren't actually using the words of scripture as I was, more using the basic bible-ness of the Bible as a spring board to their own flights of fancy. But it's okay, because here's Richard Herring doing the entire first page of the new testement...

I won't continue to hurl videos your way dear reader, although I have had a whale of a time researching this. I hope I've made my point though, because from Stewart Lee to the Life of Brian, religion, the Bible, God, Jesus and the Holy Wotnot have provided an obvious backdrop from which to launch a comedic offensive.

And okay, I'll concede that you won't often get 10 minute disections of the Bibles oddest moments at your local working mans club, or Jongleurs, but then I'm not sure that's the kind of comic I want to be. I was really pleased with the little routine I wrote, and if the general public find it alienating, boring or out dated, then at the very least I feel like I'm in in good company

Jesus Christ Superstar!

2009-04-02T04:30:00.000-07:00

When you spend your days practically weeping into your duvet because you can't get a job or be bothered to write any new jokes it's always nice to have a reason to get out of the house, so thank heaven for my old chums and former employers at Myspace Comedy who mailed yesterday asking me to appear in a sketch. As per it was a brilliantly funny idea, an X-Factor rip off to find the new Jesus. Title? 'The † Factor', obviously. Knowing the usual Comedybox suspects as I do it wasn't hard to sense the hand of the rather brilliant Sarah Campbell in this one, it's just her bag.

I rolled up fashionably (oh, all right, typically) late to the Cavendish Arms in Stockwell (mental note, they do a fortnightily open mic night. Must wander along one of these days) to find a sunny pub garden full of people drinking beer, dressed as Jesus. As you do. It says a lot about involvment in the comedy world that I now barely blink at such sites. There was a pimp Jesus, a tramp Jesus (the brilliant Nathaniel Tapley as it happens, pictured above) a glamour model Jesus (she was very nice, her name was Chloe, she also insisted on being in the picture. You can see her here blindfold boxing), a South African Jesus, a French-Asian Acrobat Jesus, and...er...Luke Toulson. Sarah was doing the Kate Thornton/Dermot bit dressed as a Nun. As I said, I barely even register this stuff as weird these days (besides, Sarah dresses as a Nun quite often). Everyone ready to do a 'Jesus' turn in front of the judges, (a brilliantly cast Tiffany Stevenson, Brigitte Aphrodite and Paul Litchfield).

This did present a bit of a problem, in that most of the others had actually prepared some form of act for the sketch, where as I had hastily re-written an old sketch of mine that disproves Jesus's miracles, delivered as a monologue by a former public school chap who thought he was the new messiah. Before I did my bit it was suggested that maybe I should be slightly racist as well, so I went on stage before the judges and improvised about being the "new 21st century messiah, only, ya know, not a dark chap like the last one". It was nice to improvise with the "judges" and see what came out. I have literally no idea if any of it was any good, I suppose we'll see if it gets included in the finished sketch or not.

It was a fun afternoon in the Sun with friends anyway.

On a side note, last night I caught the new Richard Curtis film, The Boat that Rocked. On the off chance you're interested...it's okay, the cast is too big to really care about any of the characters and just for once Rhys Darby doesn't do as well as he usually does. But it's decent knockabout fun, and the soundtrack is ace. Go and see it if you have nothing better to do I suppose. Like me!

Cruelty to Children

2009-03-31T09:13:00.000-07:00

Television takes increasingly weird twists and as we get progressively further towards Rape An Ape becoming reality. This morning I sat transfixed in front of the CBBC Channel while Who Wants To Be A Superhero unfolded before my baffled eyes. This may be the moment where children's programming on the BBC -the channel that gave us Doctor Who, Dark Season, Trev and Simon and Blue Peter- finally nukes the fridge. The show takes the Project Runway/America's Next Top Model formula and applies it to kids who want to be super heroes. Thirteen oldish kids (the youngest is nine, the eldest just inside their teens) have designed themselves Super Hero personas and must compete in daily tasks -Set by Stan Lee himself, no-less- to see who has the most comic book potential, the winner getting an american Holiday and a Stan Lee designed comic with them as the star.

It's not the format that's odd though, because it's the same one used by countless poorly executed reality comps around the world, it's seeing it applied to children. At the end of todays show three of them were picked to be possibly "powered down" (eg sent home) and had to stand under spotlights while hapless Dick-and-Dom-Lite Pop Idol rejects Sam and Mark picked which of the blubbing pre-teens wearing ridiculous spandex outfits got sent packing from the kids paradise they'd been enjoying, into the waiting of arms of their jeering friends, who'll probably have already got the "I am a batty man, kick me" stickers ready to attach to the back of their coats for the rest of their lives. There is no way any 12 year old is going to live this down through secondary school.

Today's challenge saw the kids first have to argue over who gets the camp bed and who gets the plush bunks ("I have to have a bed because I get sore back when I sleep, and anyway I'm not moving." said 'Mega Mighty Man' sprawling over his bunk while his fellow hero in waiting -the one with a genuine disability no less- found himself sleeping on floor level due to being a bit slow) before heading out for a running race where they were cleverly tricked one at a time into having to help an old lady or finish the race quickly. Obviously because most children are selfish fuckers, they ignored the old dear and tried to win the race while we the viewer watch on in horror at the youth of today.

It's already obvious who the Beeb are favouring. One of the children is not only black and has glasses, but has sort of gnarled and mangled hands. Ethnic and disabled? That's reality TV gold! And he stopped to help the old lady.

The whole thing feels creepy and exploitative. Of course children are cunts, that's no reason to show us their darker side on a supposedly frothy feel good show. And I certainly don't enjoy seeing them being forced into a stressful vote-off finale in humiliating outfits.

At what point did Knightmare, Fun House and Run The Risk stop being acceptable formats for childrens game shows?

The world still has some goodness left though. I went to see the brilliant new production of A Little Night Music last night in the West End. It's a pearl, go and see it.

Sunday Night at the Horse

2009-03-30T09:25:00.000-07:00

Some gigs, as I've said, are just fucking weird. But then some weird gigs are actually quite fun. There seems to be no rhyme nor reason to this comedy wotnot I've involved myself in. Last Night I rocked up, with a hopeful spring in my step, to Laughing Horse Camden, on the off-chance I could get a spot. I wasn't the only one, as it turned out. Between the booked acts and the walk-up comics there was something like ten potential performers, and as it turned out about half that amount of actual punters. I'm coming to see a pattern to gigs like this. There are effectively three options.

a) The gig gets cancelled
b) The gig goes ahead, the comics perform to each other and it's weird and uncomfortable
c) The gig goes ahead, and everyone has a bit of a laugh.

Option (a) is actually the least appealing, particularly at my level when every gig is exciting regardless of the amount of people in the crowd. You spend your whole day building up to it, thinking about your material, mentally limbering, being excited about stepping up to the mic once more. Imagine spending several hours watching porn and thinking about every delicious sexual encounter of your life in preparation for a night of unequaled passion with a sexy blind-date from some sordid website, only to realise -just after you've necked the Viagra- that you've got the day wrong and have to have tea with your Nanna instead. The only hope is to ensure the old dear isn't looking while you pathetically yank one off into the biscuit tin and have a bit of a cry. Cancelled gigs are a bit like that.

Option (b) is a bitter-sweet affair, where the sordid blind-date turns out to be 40 years older and ten stone heavier than her picture. It's not quite what you imagined, but there's usually something to gain from forging ahead anyway.

Fortunately this was a (c) gig, where it turns out the blind-date is actually an old girlfriend using a pseudonym. It's a bit awkward, not as spontaneous, but in it's own way quite comforting and worthwhile because everyone knows what to do.

It was decided not to charge the guests, and that everyone would try and do new stuff and everyone would get a go. Seeing as there was a couple of chums involved (Grainne Maguire was MCing, the ubiquitous Alistair Grieves was lurking around a corner and Lou Sanders who helped me get my first ever gig, was in fine fettle) there was a nice supportive feel, and okay, it wasn't the most perfect of comic experiences, but there's always something to take from gigs like this. Grainne, who really is a delightful comic, gee'd up the crowd quite nicely, only to have them remain stoney faced for the actual acts. In fact most of them vanished in the interval, despite some impressive hard work from the comics. The lack of actual punters (now down to one) didn't damped the second half though, if anything it went a bit better. Now playing purely to the comics, Lou delivered some of the strongest gags I've yet seen from her (and I've seen Lou Sanders LOADS), Alistair had some cracking stuff (Warhammer fans should look out for his Ice Planet gag) and Grainne was waving her Guinness around with obvious enjoyment. It was an even smaller crowd but everyone was pretty cheerful.

I went on last, and got introduced as the 'Headline Act', which if you were a paying punter would be bit like going to a Beatles gig to find yourself watching The Pete Best Band. Brilliantly Grainne got the single last genuine audience member in the crowd (who as it turns out wants to try stand up himself, he later revealed at the bar) to bring me on by repeating what she whispered in his ear. She had to tell him my name twice, which pretty much said it all (and I said so.)I decided to just do new stuff and play with ideas, managing to work up some bits I want to develop further, which was nice. It was quite exciting to set myself the challenge of not using ANY of the material from my more rehearsed set, and I quite enjoyed myself despite about 60% of the gags falling flat. I even did the Spandau Ballet poem.

Not the most successful of Comedy shenanigans then, but a nice time had all the same. Still, it will be nice to get away from the open-mic and playing-to-the-other-acts affairs next Sunday when I do One Mighty Craic.

One final thought for you, Jerry Springer style. Proof if proof were needed that vanity will ultimately make you depressed. I was googling my own name yesterday and came across this:

I don't know who this other Marc Burrows is, or how he met his demise. But I hope, wherever he is, his T-Shirt and Westlife tribute makes him proud, and that he is doesn't think i'm sullying his good name with my low quality beginner comedy. RIP indeed Marc B.

Good Words and Good Books

2009-03-27T19:33:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if yesterdays critique of my critique (are you following this?) was the wisest move, and very possibly I was a bit hasty. I know a couple of the comics on the night said they had a great time (both pointed to the free beer as an important factor), although other comics I have mentioned it to were far more outraged on my behalf than I was myself.

I wonder if I should go back next month and learn some more?

Either way it was a relief last night to find myself in the warm fuzziness of the excellent monthly poetry night Bang! Said The Gun. I've mentioned before that I occasionally a dabble a bit in poetry, although it's very rare that it gets a proper outing. I like Bang! though, it has a lovely welcoming feel and is quite unlike other nights of it's ilk, being a showcase for its four regulars with an open-mic slotted in the middle. When it comes to poetry I seem to have accidentally fallen into a tradition of always writing something on the day I perform. Once I realised I'd been doing it, it seemed obvious to carry on...meaning I needed something new, fresh from my head...this what I came up with.

Spandau Ballet
Why can't the whole world be more like
Spandau Ballet?
Ready to put aside their differences in the pursuit of
Art, Music and lots and lots of money.
Oh! Tony Hadley
Oh! that one off Eastenders...
And his Brother.
Oh!...the other two.
If only everyone was more like you.
Only with better songs.

Now, eagle eyed followers of That Joke Isn't Funny will spot some connections to this blog entry from wednesday. To my delight my words are eating themselves. I'm blogging about my life, but the process of writing is actually producing creative results I can take away and use, and then blog about again. It's a literary Ouroboros. I'm also developing some stand-up based around my Job Centre rant. I will be Richard Herring before I know it, only younger and substantially less talented and successful than he was at my age.

I like performing at Bang!, it doesn't have the high pressure of a comedy club -which means its less innately thrilling- but still gives me the opportunity to banter a bit, try out mini-routines and make people laugh, and if I'm not funny it's fine because people aren't really there for funny. I'm going to do a longer spot on April 30th. It's at the Roebuck on Great Dover Street, near Borough station, you should pop along.

It also afforded me the chance to see the baffling Ant Smith, the self styled Gene Pitnet of Poetry who sings all of his words in a rather spiffing tenor. Very much a new experience.

And if that wasn't enough to cheer me up (and get me over my first official sign-on at Peckham Job Centre today), tonight I found myself selling t-shirts for the lovely Good Books. I go back with the band a little way, I did their merch for over a month of gigs on their first headline tour in 2007, and it was lovely to get requainted. Their new stuff is great and I can't wait for the second album. There first record, Control, was cruelly over-looked. It was one of the albums of the year for me. Go and have a listen.

My favourite moment of the evening came from one punter who visited me at the merch stand and told me she'd loved my performance. I pointed out I wasn't in the band, and she refused to believe me, mistaking me for GB Basstype Chris. She seemed to think he was even dressed in my shirt (he wasn't). I tried to prove her wrong by claiming that Chris wears glasses, and she said "well you could have just taken them off". I had no come-back to this. She had a point. I gave up. There are worse things to be mistaken for than Chris from Good Books.

Critical Reaction

2009-03-26T12:51:00.000-07:00

There are three reasons why I was worried about doing last nights gig. Firstly this was my first gig since this time last week, and that had been half poetry which obviously I don't tend to include in my normal set (I'm hoping I can marry the two at some point, but just now it comes out sounding like Tim Key, and I can't do Tim Key better than Tim Key does). This is the longest I'd gone without doing a gig since kicking off my stand-up 'career' properly at the end of January. Secondly this was a Gong Show, and I'd never done one before. Gong Shows are nerve racking affairs where the audience can boot you off whenever they think you're lagging. Heckling is generally more accepted than usual and a couple of duff lines in a row will end your stage time pretty smartly. I'm not sure I'm quite prepared for the scrutiny and disapointment. Finally due to yesterdays pervasive lethargy, I had yet to follow the example of Spandau Ballet and get some work done, rearranging my set into a more Gong-Friendly version, nor really written anything new.

This in mind, it was a slightly nervy me that wandered down New Cross Road yesterday, looking for the venue. As it turns out none of the above turned about to be huge issues, though the gig wasn't exactly an ideal experience. Read on dear follower.

As any comic will tell you some gigs are just fucking weird (although none quite as weird as this one recently endured by the excellent Tiernan Douieb), this is especially true on the new-act circuit, mostly consisting as it does of near-as Open Mic nights where the promoter books 15 or so comics and relies on them to bring in a couple of mates each, making a decent sized audience. Fairly often the 15 or so comics will actually be the audience. Which is always a bit disheartening but can create quite a nice little atmosphere of camaraderie and support, and anyway at this burgeoning level where stage-time and experience is valuable whatever the crowd, any time in front of a mic is worth the effort.

Pretty much as soon as I walked into the New Cross Inn I knew it was going to be a comics-as-audience sort of gig. The promoter/MC, Karl Edrik, was excitable and friendly enough and introduced everyone who walked in to everyone else, but admitted straight away that he had no-idea how many people were going to turn up, as the venue had done the promotion, not him. The gig was due to start in 40 minutes and the pub was completely empty. It was quickly decided to ditch the Gong element, which is pretty sensible as no-one wants to gong off another act, and just go for it. There were a couple of familiar faces lurking round, including Johnny who runs the Saturday night 'Looks Like We Have A Comedian' open-mic in Picadilly, which is a really lovely gig, and Alistair Grieves who runs 'Comedy Lake', which I'm playing next month. Both great blokes and good acts. There was also some free beers and everyone was taking things in their stride...as I said gigs like this happen fairly often.

I decided seeing as it was a crowd of comics (and 4 genuine punters. And the bar staff) I'd try and stay away from my usual set for a while and play off the top of my head. It's not something I get to do often, and I was genuinely interested in how I'd cope off-script, just to see where my mind would take me. So I ranted for a little while on my wonderful experience in the job centre on Tuesday, which yielded some good bits I might use again, Karl had brought me on as "fresh faced" so I dug out a little of my "I look younger than I actually am" bits from the first routine I'd written, and did a gag I was quite proud of about the green and pink lighting making the gig best enjoyed using 3-D glasses, finishing up with my "God's Cock Shame" routine. This last part, which i've done at all my gigs for the last month, irked me a bit as it felt quite unrehearsed and sloppy compared to last week, highlighting the need to look over my material when I have a week off gigging. It all went okay, if not extraordinary.

What happened next was a bit of a surprise. I took my seat feeling it had gone sort-of okay considering my aim was to see what came out when I opened my mouth. The PA was really loud so it had been hard to hear the audience response, but I'd gleaned enough of what had and hadn't worked and felt reasonably happy with what I was taking from the experience. Which is what it's all about at this stage, really. Which is when Karl stepped back up to the mic. Of all the things you expect to hear an MC say after you've done your bit "well you started out well" isn't top of the list. What followed was a short critique of my set, words I shouldn't have used, things I shouldn't have said, and an admonishment for making his job harder to come and pick up the pieces after me. I was, frankly, a bit stunned. Is this normal? I've not done all that many gigs after all (last night was gig #12) maybe new acts are entitled to some good-natured advice from the old pro's. I honestly don't know, but something tells me it was a bit of an odd move. Not really sure what to do I pulled my notebook out and pretended to take notes, which drew a small laugh, then I sat down. He did the same thing to the next act.

Okay, I'm not saying I'm above criticism. I've asked people for honest opinions after pretty much every gig I've done. I'm a New Comic, I need the feedback have always listened eagerly to any advice my big brothers in the comedy world have to bestow. It's just I think I'd have appreciated it a little bit more had this particular elder sibling given his opinion at the bar in the interval, or maybe via email after the fact. Not smack in middle of the second section, from the stage in front of a bunch of other comics.

I left the gig a little earlier than I normally would. Some gigs are a bit too weird to stick around.

I know this much is True

2009-03-25T08:49:00.000-07:00

It's difficult to write a frivolous and moderately entertaining account of the life of an unemployed wanna-be Stand Up, when such titanic news is unfolding around the world. Not just the failing economy (which is all Twitters fault by the way), not just the ongoing saga of terrorist action and religious fundamentalism, but the reunion of Spandau Ballet. Still, we can all learn a lesson from the foppish dandys who penned 'Gold'...If the Kray twins, and the sweaty fellow in the suit from Reborn In The USA, can put aside their fairly tutonic differences in the pursuit of lots of grubby cash, then he rest of us have no excuse. Cash conquers all.

That being the case, why did I find it such a struggle to get out of bed before 2.30 this afternoon? Every morning my brain undergoes a familiar internal struggle: on one side, the need to get up, to search for a new job, to try and get myself some gigs, to write some jokes, to try and do something with my life that will put food on the table and keep my psyche from descending into a depressed mass like a concker dipped into hot marmalade. On the other side of my brain, the less taxing option of staying put, eating biscuits and watching the telly holds true. And that way lies the Marmelade.

Today which ever part of my head that favours watching bad sitcoms and last nights telly clearly got the upperhand because moving proved quite impossible. Maybe it was a reaction against yesterdays Job Centre horror? Maybe my subconscious demanded a little shut-down time. Maybe I just really wanted to watch Will & Grace this morning.

Either way, today is a day of very little achievment. My mind tried, but I just couldn't put words on the page. Which is a shame, as today I'm doing the Ivy Comedy Caberet Gong Show and I really should reorganise my gags into something a little more Gong-friendly, as I would really like this to go well.

Still, further examination of the Spandau Story does reveal one thing...the Kemp brothers are as far away from Tony Hadley as possible in the promo photos taken today on HMS Belfast. Perhaps I'm not the only one finding it difficult to do what they know is best.

Day of the Dole

2009-03-24T09:11:00.000-07:00

I feel like my unemployed status has been some how legitimised. Obviously merely the absence of paid work isn't enough, in order to get the full experience one requires government rubber stamping. Today I went on the dole.

For a lot of people signing on is a bit of a right of passage, and obviously there's nothing to be ashamed of here. Some of my best friends sign on (not true, to my knowledge none of my friends sign on at all, but they would if they had to). In my home town its probably more the norm than actually having a job, and as a child -particularly during the last recession- I have very clear memories of both of my parents happily taking cash from the council. My Dad even had this uncanny ability to sign on while still working.

And why not? I've spent the last 13 years of my working life losing part of my salary to something called 'NI'. This is my chance to take some of it back. This is, after all, what it's for. This is what William Beveridge managed to avoid fighting the war for. This is my right as a British citizen. Free money! Right on.

All this being the case, the family imperative, the genuine rights as one of her majestys subjects, the fact that i'm effectively spending money that I've put aside myself, why does signing on feel so soul-crushingly awful? Why does it feel like I'm admitting defeat? I'm a namby-pampy Guardian-reading card carrying wooley liberal wanker, of course I approve of the government supporting the unemployed. I actually believe they should get more. Especially now. It's just when the poor sod without a job is me, it still feels a little like I've failed.

Earlier today I went for my "new claims interview" at -brilliantly- Peckham Job Centre, because obviously East Dulwich doesn't have one of its own (unemployed? in Dulwich? Goodness no, how would we pay the organic butcher?) Foolishly I believed this might be a quick process. Alas no, I was in plenty of time for my 10.45am appointment -and as dole scum I resent being asked to get up before 11, ta- and didn't actually leave the sodding place until 2pm, having attended 3 seperate interviews, signed 7 different pieces of paper, and been ignored by roughly 5 members of job centre staff. Aside from a chirpy conversation with a guy on the door regarding my Watchmen badge no-one seemed especially interested in my situation, in helping me get a job that might in some way aid my career or use my experience or qualifications (okay, a 2:2 in Sociology from Loughborough isn't exactly vocational gold but they could have tried).

Why exactly did it take 3 people to sort that out? If the first fellow had dealt with the lot I'd have been out in half am hour.

Instead I sat in the waiting room tweeting ideally, reading a book of Neil Gaiman short stories and listening to the other sad stories going on at the desks around me feeling by turns

a) a complete snob.
b) guilt at feeling (a)
c) annoyance with the system
d) an utter failure.

The whole experience seemed to warp my thinking in some way. I actually found myself having this thought at my first intereview...

"Jesus, he could have at least worn a tie".

I was wearing a tie. Why was this suddenly bothering me? I wear a tie because I decided on it as a good look for me. Tie-absense in others has never even begun to bother me before. I was turning into an old lady. It was probably a good thing I couldn't go on Mark Thomas' Daily Mail protest, I'd more than likely have bolted into their offices and demanded a subscription. The dole office has turned me into someone I don't like much.

Which is quite enough information for today I think. On the thin chance of someone actually reading this far down the page, I'd prefer you to actually like me.

Anyway, my claim has been processed, I have a pile of paper work to fill in-including a sheet of A4 devided into rows which I have to fill out every time I take an active step at job hunting such as "reading the paper or searching online". Apparently if I do that less than 3 times in a forntight they'll stop my money. Surely no-one ever fails that? Even if you werent looking -and most people could fill that page in a week- faking it would be pretty easy. My application should take 7-10 days and I have to call the council about housing benefit. I now must return to the job centre every 2 weeks on a Friday afternoon.

Oh, and to top it all off the festival I was booking the comedy for in May has lost a chunk of it's funding and probably won't be happening.

It's hard not to be bitter on days like this.

Diary of an Unemployed Comedian- An Introduction

2009-03-23T12:35:00.000-07:00

Like a once proud former-lover whose changed his mind, I’ve come crawling back to my blog. I will need to do some grovelling, possibly buy it some flowers, and be really dismissive about all the other blogs I’ve written while I’ve been away, but I think…given time, we can rebuild that trust and enjoy a fruitful blogging relationship once more. What do you say Blog? Do you still feel it too?

But there’s going to have to be a change in rules. When I started ‘That Joke Isn’t Funny Anymore’ last year, it was to give myself an outlet to review, critisise and muse on assorted TV shows and comedy shenanigans. I set out a very careful house-style, with everything written in the 3rd person and the subject matter being more important that the writer. I nearly always stuck to it.

Then I got really busy, and didn’t watch enough TV, let alone have time to write about it.
But now…I have all the time in the world. I hear-by re-christen my review blog ‘Diary of An Unemployed Comedian’. The reasoning behind this being, that these are the only apsects of my existance that can be considered interesting. I’m hoping it’ll be at least a tiny bit readable for you the, well, reader, and me the…er, me, to see how these dual aspects of my current predicament pan out. And it’s always nice to see a record.

The ‘Comedian’ Bit.
I don’t want anyone to think I’ve got ideas above my station here. I’m not exactly a comic yet, what I am is starting out on the road to stand up success, mostly by doing 5 minutes here and there on the open mic/new act circuit, booking gigs myself, or pulling favours from comic friends to get a few decent gigs in the bag. I’ve been gigging a couple of times a week since my first proper London performance (discounting my Edinburgh debut in August) at the very lovely House Of Mirth in Waterloo, a gig ran by the supremely talented Jess Fostekew and TV’s Sara Pascoe. To get it out of the way, here is the only footage currently in existence of me doing stand up. This is gig number six, at Tom Webb’s excellent new-act night Party Piece in Stoke Newington.

Marc's stand up gig in stoke newington march 4th
Uploaded by teamwireless

As you can see there’s still some distance to go. But every gig gets a little better. Except for the one I did last week in Battersea, where I was on 18th of 20 acts and no-one enjoyed themselves. I barely raised a titter there.

I’m doing a Gong Show on Wednesday. That’s going to be really interesting.

The ‘Unemployed’ Bit
As of Wednesday 11th March I am bereft of full time employment, a hapless victim of this cursed recession. Bother. The main problem is I’m not really trained for much, for the last couple of years I’ve worked behind the scenes in the comedy world, first booking gigs for Avalon, then making videos for Warner and Myspace. I have a certain ability with the written word and a head full of mostly pointless trivia, but these skills are rather specialised and post Crunch there isn’t much out there. It’s been over a week since I had my second interview for this plum job, which I rather think I blew quite superbly by talking too much about comedy when I was told that comedy only really counted for 20% of the role. I’m hoping my application for this comes off, but frankly I’m probably dreaming with that one.

I may try and get a job in Dominoes in East Dulwich.

That just about brings us up to speed I think. Any days I don’t update this please send me a long email telling me I’m a wanker who can’t stick at anything.

Your humble author stars in a sketch

2009-01-19T02:37:00.000-08:00

Normal service to be resumed very soon. It's a new years revolution!

In the mean time, please enjoy spotting me in this brilliantly accurate spoof of the hideous Microsoft 'Life Without Walls' Campaign, by the perma-talented Sarah Campbell

Microsoft I'm a PC Spoof

The Offending Article

2008-09-19T04:49:00.000-07:00

Another Myspace blog I'm afriad...normal service resumed shortly.

Recently my colleague Sarah and I had an argument after seeing Canadian Stand Up Jason Rouse perform in Edinburgh. Rouse, it has to be said, is foul. Every aspect of his act is aggressive, he's scary looking, and you could argue that most of his jokes are brutally sexist. One woman in the crowd heckled with "do you have any jokes that don't hate women?", and I was glad someone had said it.

Thing is, despite all of that, I laughed a lot during his set. An awful lot, actually: shaky, uncontrollable, tears-in-my-eyes laughing. He has that polished earnestness that Canadian comics do so well (see also Glenn Wool, Craig Campbell, Phil Nichol, Stewart Francis, and Tony Law just for starters), and he's SO offensive, so ludicrously, filthily offensive, that for me the gags stop being wrong. You're not laughing at the expense of the subject of the joke, you're laughing at the sheer gall of the man for cracking gags that are so very very dark. Rouse recognises the taboos, knows where the line is, and leaps across it, and that's funny. Or at least it is to me. The laughter comes from someone daring to open their mouth and deliberately say something wrong. This is Carl Donnelly pulling the same trick at the Edinburgh Fringe, and illustrating it perfectly:

The most offensive joke Carl Donnelly ever told, SPANK! 6-08-08

That's funny, isn't it?

Isn't it?

Anyway, as I said way back in my opening sentence, Sarah and I had an argument… well, a disagreement really, after seeing one particular comic. Sarah, you see, was quite offended by his material about disabled people, feeling that some things are strictly off limits. I had no problem with jokes about the disabled, depending on the context. It's a thin line to cross, but if the purpose of the gag is to make us laugh out of shock at the sheer gall of the statement, rather than at the expense of the subject then it's sort of okay, isn't it? I had to stop myself though. Was that really how I felt? Or was I just justifying my own response? Maybe I just don't want to be a bad person who laughs at the disabled?

Where exactly is the line? Comedy is so massively, entirely subjective it's hard to pin point what is or isn't offensive. We all know homophobia, racism, sexism and… well, whatever the word is for being prejudice against the disabled is, are wrong. The fact is that the meaning behind a joke isn't necessarily clear. Is a stand up trying to provoke a reaction by being outrageous, or are they genuinely being ignorant or even abusive? And just because they don't "mean it", does that make the fact they said it any better? Take 'Borat' for example… is Sacha Baron Cohen holding a mirror that shows us the shortcomings of our own society and makes us question our values? Or is he just laughing at the expense of people not as clever as he is?

There are plenty of comedians who don't get the balance right. You can see blatantly misogynistic, racist, old fashioned comedians in any town in the world. It would be unfair to single any out (except Bernard Manning, but it's okay because he's already dead. The fat racist shit.) It's an attitude that was supposedly swept away in the early eighties with 'alternative comedy'. But Ben Elton alone couldn't save the world, and bad-tasting comedy is still very much alive and kicking.

Quite a few comics constantly parrot a Daily Mail friendly view that "Political Correctness has gone mad". For the most part they're wrong. Political Correctness is just a way of saying 'stop saying things that offend or upset people', and has been – by and large - a positive force in our culture. There's a strong argument that anything that is offensive to someone is probably a bad idea. But where's the fun in that? Where would we be without South Park or Brass Eye? Both shows made with not-inconsiderable genius that have relentlessly made light of serious issues. Take Timmy in South Park, or the infamous Brass Eye paedophile special that actually managed to make the outraged front page of the Daily Mail (a delicious irony considering the piece was an attack on media over-reaction in itself.) Both are hilarious, and have buried serious points in silly comedy by crossing the taste line and being deliberately provocative and offensive. Are these overly offensive?

Check out this clip from controversial (but wickedly funny) American stand up Scott Capurro:

The Madeline McCanCan

Capurro is so offensive it verges on the ridiculous. He calls vanished child Madeline McCann a "little bitch", makes a blatant racist slur and milks someone elses horrible situation for a cheap laugh. Guilty as charged yer honour. However… after watching that clip, would you think that Scott Capurro is racist? Not really. Would you think he'd be delighted by the abduction of children? Of course not. On some level, as a viewer, you know that these aren't sincere statements. Of course sincere or not, should they have been said?

Unfortunately, offensive is funny. It's not an ideal thing to admit to, but there's no getting around it… a good chunk of what we laugh at is at someone else's expense, and it's for each viewer to decided what is and isn't over the line. When someone offends you, it's okay to be outraged. When someone offends others, it's okay to be outraged on their behalf. But don't confuse the intent to shock with the intent for malice.

It's a very sharp line in the sand, and a dangerous one to walk. But without 'offensive' comedians pushing back the boundaries, and defining for us what is and isn't right, comedy would be that much less rich an art form.

Marc B

www.myspace.com/marcsism

Trainee Stand Up

2008-09-08T02:33:00.000-07:00

Note to That Joke Isn't Funny Regulars...I wrote this for the new Myspace Comedy UK site I'm currently working for, although I don't think they're going to use it. I figured I may as well sling it up here too. Normal service will resume shortly, now I have more time to actually watch television. The Myspace blog also has review of Fringe shows wot I wrote. If you're, you know, interested.

As a result, please excuse the foray into the self indulgent waters of first person. I hate breaking my own house style.

Marc B

I suppose it was inevitable. I've worked in Comedy getting on for two years, I've been obsessed with it ever since I can remember (I had the entire series of the Young Ones memorised by the time I was about nine), I've been quoting bits of other peoples stand up ever since I was old enough to know what it was. I've seen hundreds of comics and I go to gigs all the time. Basically I love stand up comedy, and I've been pretty passionate about it for a pretty long time.

I was going to have to go give it a go.

Let's get this out of the way now. I wasn't going into Stand Up expecting to be any good at it. I wasn't going on stage to succeed…I was doing it to see if I could pull it off at all. To not-fail, rather than actually succeed: these are two very different things. It was an experiment. I've had some loose material knocking around my head for a while now, and it had gotten to the point where I just had to know if it was any good. I'd reviewed and booked and worked with hundreds of comics. At the Edinburgh Fringe I was watching them all day, and maybe every fourth comic I saw made me think "with some work I reckon I could do that". Just (admittedly every other comic I saw made me go "Damn. I'm not clever enough.")It got to the point where I had to give it a go.

So I asked a comic-friend who put me in touch with someone, and bang…5 minutes at the Tron in Edinburgh on a Thursday night. Simple as that.

Oh. My.

At which point I realised I was actually going to have to write some material, get the stuff out of my head and on to a page. So I wrote it all out. I said it out loud. I crossed most of it out. I wrote it again. I said it out loud.

Bugger. There were no jokes in it.

What I'd written was a reasonably engaging comic story about looking slightly younger than I actually am, with a reasonably funny ending. I was sort-of happy with it, but there weren't enough gags layered through the whole thing, they were all stuck at the end. Watch any half way decent stand up and you know they win or lose an audience in the first 30 seconds of their set…my best bit wasn't until minute 5. So I did a little rewriting, and worked on performing it a little. It was…okay. Stand up convention dictates you should start by voicing whatever the audience is probably thinking when you hit the stage…it pre-empts heckles, and gets a cheap laugh at your own expense in the first 5 seconds. For example… "I know what you're thinking…Paedophile" (Daniel Kitson), "I know what your thinking…the body of Peter Crouch and the head of Postman Pat" (Tom Wrigglesworth), or "don't worry…I've never heard of you either" (Stewart Francis). I had one of those, but decided not to kick off with it, because I wasn't sure it was strong enough. I insterted it about a minute in. To be honest the opening gag was the thing that had me most worried. I'd got the rest of the act –such as it was- into a reasonable condition. Other things did occur to me, but I thought I'd best stick to what I'd got for now.

The night of the show approached, and still I wasn't quite there. I had the timing right, I took the night off, I made sure no-one knew what I was doing (if I was going to fail at this I was damned if anyone would ever know about it), but I still needed some tweaking. The day drew on, my stomach twisted itself into knots.

On the way to the venue I thought of an opening. It wasn't a great opening, but it was okay. I'll keep the details to myself in case it never works again.

I got to the show, met Sean the compere –nice bloke-, there were only 17 people there. Fine by me. Then two things happened that weren't supposed to. First of all I had to follow James Dowdeswell, whose been in Extras with Ricky Gervais and is a very funny man. Then there was Nick Doody who is an exceptional stand up, then right before me was Shazia Mirza whose been on Have I Got News For You and everything. Okay, this isn't going great. I'm not going to compare…I hastily re-wrote my opening to "hello, my names Marc, and yes I am the first act tonight whose not actually been on the telly".

The second thing that went wrong, and for my money the very last thing I expected, is an old friend from University walked in, and was delighted to see me. And even more delighted to know I was performing. Great.

But you know, I'm a pro (natch) so I ignored the distractions, and waited my turn. The nerves actually settled, and having someone to talk to sort of helped.

I did it.

I've left that sentence on its own, because it's a small achievement by itself. I did it. I did 5 minutes of stand up comedy. And you know what? It wasn't bad. Okay, it wasn't by any stretch of the imagination actually good…I doubt any of those 17 punters will remember me except for a faintly amusing sorbet between two proper acts. But I wasn't bad. I got laughs…small ones, but I expected that. It confirmed that my material didn't really have enough jokes in it…as I suspected it was a reasonably compelling comic story, but didn't provide enough laughs. I was surprised (okay, read disapointed) to find it was the cheaper gags that got the laughs, where as the funnier moments of my story warranted mere politeness and some giggles. But it proved that I could, just about, do it. Sort of. It was something worth perusing.

I'm not saying I'm looking at Stand Up as a career, or even thinking about doing it a lot. But that one gig went okay, if nothing else it proved to me I should do another one, and then another. Just to see. At the very least I can say I've had a go.

It'll be easy. I just need to write some jokes.

Marc is coming to a comedy club near you. Except he won't be telling anyone before hand, in case he's rubbish.

Still really love brown toast? Peep Show Series 5 Review

2008-06-08T14:42:00.001-07:00

Series Five of Peep Show (Channel 4 legal edict dictates it should always be prefaced with the words “Award Winning Sitcom”, or at a push “acclaimed” but we heed not these petty rules) seems to have been over in the blink of an eye. One minute we were watching the opening episode in a critics screening hoping Bruce Dessau hadn’t paid any attention to our photo on the small chance he’d read this blog, trying to avoid making eye contact with him just in case, and concentrating on the screen in spite of the projector glare from Robert Webb’s bald patch; the next watching the credits role six weeks later on a flummoxed Mark in episode six, no wiser than he was back when the show launched in 2003. A good time, then, to reflect…

It’s always polite to start with the good stuff. Peep Show is still one of the most consistently painful and brilliant experiences in TV comedy today. Every episode has a guaranteed squirm factor, and several guaranteed laughs, and its testimony to its brilliance that six years on (although as David Mitchell has pointed out, that’s only one series on an American sitcom) we still care about Mark and Jez. Series Five has been funny, undeniably, undoubtably funny.

But there’s something wrong. Something we can’t quite put our finger on. For the first time since its inception, Peep Show wasn’t the classiest work on telly. Though there was still much to like, this series felt somehow incidental, unimportant, missable. Not bad by any means, not even off-the-boil in the way The Simpsons or Scrubs has gone. Just…ordinary.

There’s been something of diminishing returns in Peep Show, basically since it went to a second series. The first round of episodes remains the shows peak, with Mark and Jez feeling like representatives for everything we don’t like about ourselves. Their internal monologue reflected our own: Petty struggles and little victories that we could all relate to (“Of course I'm the one whose laughing as I actually love brown toast”/ “Yeah, take that Big Suze. Your toilet seat regime is over”). From series two we seemed to move away from that, with scenarios becoming more farcical, more desperate, and our champs becoming less everyman and more pathetic. The cringey-can’t-believe-what-we’re-seeing-painful-funny version of the show probably peaked last year with dog eating and Jez pissing himself in church. It’s hard to believe Peep Show will quite reach those peaks again.

In a way, it was series four that really made this more recent offering suffer. The finale of the past series saw the wedding of Mark and Sophie: the end point of an arc that dominated that series (Mark doesn’t want to get married but can’t quite seem to call it off), and the culmination of Marks story for the entire four-series run. After that event was out of the way, there was always going to be an air of redundancy. It also seemed to lose track of it’s own rules: Mark is a tragic loser who hates himself and is ridiculously awkward with women…so how come he finds himself involved with a different one in each episode? It’s not that no women should fancy Mark, but they seem to be coming along with unnatural frequency.

Missing, was an arc that gently steered the stories. There were loose themes (Mark’s search for “The One”, Jez’s sudden cash crisis) but they never felt as compelling as the broader issues dealt with in the past. With the exception of the last episode, the show never really felt it was going anywhere. There could have been something to play on…wasn’t Mark’s Dad supposed to appear in this series?–the daunting figure who has been hinted at since series one? Possibly he was dropped for Jez’s Mum, which is a shame as Mark’s Dad is probably the most interesting story pay-off left in the show.

Of course it wasn’t all bad. We could squeak for weeks at the perfect casting of Isy Suttie as Dobby the office techy, and she did us proud. The dialogue was as sharp as ever, and those internal voiceovers are still brilliantly written. Johnson is still ace.

This series performed well in the ratings, and deservedly so- even off form Peep Show beats the pants of most of the Friday Night Fare, and a sixth outing is in the bag already. Let’s just hope for a little more substance to the shenanigans next time around. The end of the series (a baby!) suggests it will. We’re always ready to give Peeps Show another chance.

Delta flies under the radar

2008-05-30T09:57:00.001-07:00

There was something quite likeable about the latest BBC3 Comedy pilot, Delta Forever, a tale of obsessive book fans connected by a website.

The script worked hard to squeeze quite a lot of ideas into a very short space. The writing team of Jon Hunter, Misha Manson Smith, Holly Walsh, Greg McHugh and Ben Bond managed to cover the weirdness of media-two-point-wotsit better than almost any other script yet to tackle the subject. Many have tried and failed to nail online culture in a TV format, to our mind at least this is the first time it’s been done successfully, certainly such an effective satire of the web-wide-world we live in, is quite rare just now. Delta Forever manages to cover obsessive fans, video bloggers, ebay opportunists and creepy ad-men trying to get their head around web culture.

It helps that the whole thing was supported by a bunch of perky performances, notably by comic Greg McHugh (whose brilliant Gary: Tank Commander character debuted over on More4 this week), whose bitter obsessive chews up the webcam, and is easily the stand-out turn of the piece. Also of note was rentabitch Antonia Campbell Hughes, and sketch stalwart Jonny Sweet (the remaining third of the House Of Windsor not currently moonlighting as an Imbetweener over on E4)

We’re pretty sure that, unlike the baffling headfuck of Phoo Action or the dark twists of Being Human, there’s not enough lurking beneath the surface here to warrant a full series. It wasn’t well promoted, and flew in rather under the radar, which is a shame: Delta Forever had a lot going for it as a self contained little teleplay with something to talk about, proving at least that someone at BBC3 has more than a surface understanding of the interweb.

Half Time Summery: Doctor Who Series Four

2008-05-29T10:38:00.000-07:00

As we’ve reached half time on Series Four of Doctor Who, it seems a sensible point to stop and take stock. Especially as we have been rather lazy and haven’t been writing blog entries since the current run began. Not that we haven’t been following the series, obviously

First thing to note, is that the beginning of New Who Vol. 4 came off the back of two important developments:

1) That series three had been the strongest so far. In fact, we’re continually baffled that more people don’t seem to think this. Series three was INCREDIBLE. It started with the strongest season opener yet (‘Smith and Jones’), had Russell T Davies’ most startlingly imaginative writing since the re-boot (notably ‘Gridlock’), the best hairs-on-the-back-of-the-neck moment yet (Derek Jacobi’s reawakening as The Master in ‘Utopia’), and of course it had ‘Blink’- the single best piece of television this country has produced in ten years. Okay, we acknowledge that there were weaker moments (the Dalek two-parter springs to mind) and a slightly below-par finale, but the good out-weighed the bad by a long way. And we’ve not even mentioned how perfect John Simm was. The bar was set pretty high.

2) That, against all odds, the second series of Torchwood –winding up just as the Doctor Who starter pistol went off- was really, really good. Characters who previously had all the pathos of burnt sticks were suddenly living, breathing people, who we cared about after all. The finale had some genuinely brilliant moments. The bar just went up a bit.

As a result, when ‘Partners in Crime’ made its early-tea-time debut it had a lot to live up to. More than it could justifiably deliver, really. And though the witty script was actually one of the more original RTD efforts yet delivered, the episode itself just didn’t pull its weight. Things were looking up with a trip to Pompei for episode 2, with career-best CGI (those Lava monsters probably cost the entire budget of series one), with some decent scares and a solid Doctor Who story. Between the two episodes we get the general feel for the series: quirky and silly on the one side, weepy and emotive on the other, with Catherine Tate’s Donna acting both as a comic foil and moral compass for David Tennant’s ever active Doctor. We’re suspecting the whimsy has peaked with the recent ‘The Unicorn and the Wasp’, with a slide towards hankie-and-sofa-cushion territory to come as the series progresses.

There has been plenty to enjoy. Catherine Tate has been a pleasant surprise, though –Kylie aside- still the least effective of the New Who companions. When she TONES DOWN THE SHOUTING she proves a much more subtle and affecting actress than the evidence of ‘The Runaway Bride’ would have suggested, and she and Tennant play off each other well as a double act. Occasionally she grates, and sometimes feels a little surplus to requirements (‘The Doctors Daughter’ could have done fine without her). CGI has been pretty exemplary (the Vespiform morph in ‘The Unicorn…’ aside), and there have been a handful of really stand out moments: Martha’s clone in ‘The Sontaron Strategy’, Georgia Moffat’s energetic freshness in (‘…Daughter’), Captain Darling.

Despite this though, and despite a lack of genuinely poor pieces, the whole doesn’t feel like it hangs together. It’s difficult to put your finger on, but as yet series four of Doctor Who feels less than the sum of its parts. There’s still time, and certainly the series as a whole is probably neck-and-necking with series 2. We have great hopes for the next 6 episodes, and with RTD moving on after the next round of specials his self-penned final 4 episodes, featuring Rose, Daleks and something mysterious that blocks out the stars are oozing with potential.

We’re hard not to predict what’s going to happen, although it’s fairly safe to say that Donna’s journey to the end of the series probably won’t be an easy one. We’ll actually be rather surprised if she survives…not to mention a little disappointed. Not because we dislike Donna, but because the new series has not yet had the courage to murder it’s companions, always a good way of delivering a thrill in the original series. We don’t count Kylie, we didn’t have much really invested in her. The companion-fest in the season finale (Donna, Martha, Rose, Captain Jack, Sarah Jane and Ianto and Gwen from Torchwood allegedly) might prove a bit of an over load. It’ll be interesting to see how RTD handles Davros (almost certainly on his way back), and whether he resists the temptation to bring back The Master after that teaser with the ring at the close of S4 in some sort of Dalek/Master face-off.

What's To Come:

He’s Not A Prince, He’s Not a King

2008-05-15T15:31:00.000-07:00

Occasionally there’s a show that you thoroughly expect to dislike, and for reasons you don’t fully understand ends up owning a little corner of your soul. Such a one is The Inbetweeners, currently finding it’s feet on E4 of an evening. Maybe it’s because there are few other shows in 2008 that give you the opportunity to re-visit Sleeper lyrics in blog headlines, but we like to think it goes deeper than that.

Inbetweeners follows four teenage boys in the first year of sixth form, and probably works best if you’re the generation that actually understand the cultural gap between year 11, year 12 and year 13, because those differences are crucial here. Inbetweeners is possibly the only TV show ever written that really understands the burgeoning freedom and weird sense of impending adulthood pushing it’s way through the brains of 17 year old boys, trying their best to be at the same time grown ups who like cars and girls, and schoolboys who like football and their Mum.

Our main way in to the world of adolescent shame and fumbling geekorama is Simon Bird as Will, a bookish posho with a fit Mum who finds himself at a suburban comp, eventually gravitating to the similarly likeable, hopelessly geeky Joe Thomas as Simon. Comedy nerds will recognise the pair as two thirds of excellent House Of Windsor sketch show, and the infamous Cambridge Footlights (no less) from a few years back. Simon is also in this years Chortle Student Comic of the Year finals for something like the 20th time. The duo are paired up with comedy sidekicks and class prats Neil (over-tall, not too bright) played by Blake Harrison and Jay (Loud mouthed, impressionable, bit of a wanker) aka James Buckley. The quartet are so recognisable as the likeable-but-not-faniciable-uncool group everyone who was ever in sixth form either knew or actually were part of. We’re going to come clean and say that was us, which is probably why Inbetweeners Resonates so well for us.

Probably more significant is the shows relationship to Skins: eg, none at all. Both deal with a similar age range, both are E4 products, but their the similarity ends. While Skins is the fast paced, shagging-and-booze life we either wish we had or suspect our younger sisters have, Inbetweeners is the awkward, gangly truth, celebrating the brilliant mediocrity of being 17, of your first mate to learn to drive, your mates inexplicable other mates, and cool people who don't look at you twice.

Who knows what the fates hold for Inbetweeners. It's not edgy enough to gain much media profile, not culty enough to be an underground hit. But it is honest, watchable and absolutely genuine.

Okay it's not a work of art, or anything...it's nothing special, it's not too smart...it's just The Inbetweeners.

Horne and Corden are not Pegg and Frost

2008-05-15T09:47:00.000-07:00

James Corden and Matthew Horne are everywhere. It wouldn’t have surprised us if one of them had won the London election. Honestly, give them a BAFTA and they think they’re the new Python.

Well…actually, maybe the new Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, as the pair are to star in Brit Horror-com Lesbian Vampire Killers ("Two no-hopers. One cursed village. One hell of a night!"), which probably would never have got a greenlight if the Pegg/Frost/Wright Romzomcom modern-classic (we’ll stand by that ‘Modern Classic’ claim if anyone doubts us, in a fight if necessary) Shaun of the Dead hadn’t been a hit.

The comparison doesn’t stop with forays into British genre films though. Both duos have presented the NME awards (2005 for S&N, 2008 for J&M), both have backgrounds in Sketch shows (Big Train, Man/Woman, The –Non-Award Winning-Catherine Tate Show, the new Corden/Horne project) both have broken new ground in Sitcoms (Spaced and Gavin and Stacey…Modern Classics again), and of course there’s a fat one and a thin one. But we’re not that superficial.

As for the flick itself, we’re not sure how we feel about it just yet. The presence of Horne and Corden (“so hot right now”) is probably a good sign: the duo would presumably have their pick of projects just now, so the fact they’ve chosen this as their vehicle at least indicates a decent script.

Aside from that though, nothing about Lesbian Vampire Killers really inspires much confidence: it’s written by a couple of jobbing TV writers who cut their comedy teeth on clips shows and utter dross like Ball of Steel, producer Steve Clarke-Hall appears to have never worked on a decent film in his entire career (Dungeons and Dragons 2: Wrath of the Dragon God, anyone?) and production company AV Pictures only notable release has been woeful Kelly Brooke vehicle School For Seduction.

And of course films that start from a title and work backwards –even if that title is done with tongue firmly in cheek, are seldom worth the admission price.

Still, who are we to judge, it’s not out yet and it might end up a masterpiece. Time will tell.

Apologies

2008-05-15T09:44:00.000-07:00

For the lapse in writing. Normal service will now be resumed...afterall, we know how many of you are disapointed at That Joke being off-air!

Honey Monster Rips Off Boosh scandal

2008-03-17T15:10:00.000-07:00

While adverts ripping off proper telly (not that adverts aren't proper telly mind) is nothing especially new (we're sure red cars and blue cars had races before Milky Way told them they could) it's rarely this blatent. Good lord, will you take a look at this...

Delicious puffs of wheat in little honey jackets they may be, but that's no excuse for plagiarism. Unless you're Noel Gallagher.

We're trying to work out if the Boosh can actually ride this one to court, after all it's pretty blatant and you never saw this before Mssrs Fielding and Barrett turned up. Although should they take it that far they may find themselves dragging their comedy pot past The Goodies, who'll be seeking Legal Advice while brandishing a black kettle.

Let's enjoy some proper Crimpage

My over-extended Family

2008-03-13T04:40:00.000-07:00

Hidden at the bottom of Chortle today –and as far as we can make out unreported elsewhere on the web- is the announcement of a 9^th series of My Family. Ninth? That’s…that’s….loads. That’s over taking Fools and Horses in standard episodes.

My Family baffles us. Is there anyone alive who actually rings it in the Radio Times, takes the phone off the hook, makes a nice cup of tea and settles down to half-hour of Harper family fun? Does anyone have My Family DVD marathons? It’s difficult to imagine, but somehow it’s been hogging the prime-time-limelight for the best part of a decade.

Thing is, when My Family first cropped up it wasn’t all that bad. It’s always nice to see Wolfy Smith back on the box, pre-BT Kris Marshall was a welcome addition to telly-land – we remember him getting laughs just for walking on screen in Love Actually- and the more Daniela Denby-Ashe the better as far as we’re concerned. It was a bit silly, had a classic farce-sitcom format that had been absent for a while, was reasonably well written and wiled away a half hour fairly amicably.

Eight years on and the scripts have got so hackneyed the principles are actually refusing to shoot them. This is Zoe Wanamaker talking to the Telegraph in March, 2007:

“What attracted me to the first scripts was that they had a slightly quirky, American Jewish quality to them. That's my humour. Critics absolutely hated it. The public liked it. But it's turned into a machine. Robert and I even refused at one point to do one, it was so bad. That caused a lot of problems, but we just felt it was not good enough. We had practically a football team of scriptwriters working on the last series”

But still they soldiered on, not-laughing all the way to the bank. And someone must have watched it, because here we are with a ninth successive outing. What else is there for the Harper family to do? They pole-vaulted the shark several years ago, none of the cast are really bothered anymore (Robert Lynsey and Zoe Wanamaker are established thesps, while your phone bill keeps Kris Marshall in moose for his lovely floppy fringe. Gabriel Thompson just sits there, glumly waiting for Daniel Radcliffe to be killed in a fire), it’s a flogged-out cash cow, cowering in the farmers yard waiting for the tragic inevitability/blessed relief found inside a metaphorical dog food tin.

iPlayer hacked, world fails to stop turning

2008-03-13T04:02:00.000-07:00

In a move that will surprise absolutely no-one (except maybe Bruce Dessau, whose still getting his head round internet video) some clever sod has hacked the iPlayer (apparently in 12 minutes.) This will probably disappoint, or perhaps even surprise some of the TV top brass still hoping that telly won’t “do a music industy” and accidently bung out all their product for free. It really shouldn’t shock them though…Aunty Beeb herself has responded with

“This is not unusual or surprising,”

a quote which we think works best in delivered in a slightly weary and non-plussed tone.

It does beg the question: if something is utterly inevitable is it still news?

Of course the debate about whether this stuff should be freely downloadable and absent of DRM is another kettle of ethically-sourced cod all together. For the record we think the answer is…er…'sometimes'. Unless it’s something we want and can’t afford just now, in which case the answer is ‘always’.

Brilliant black comics? The BBC Needs YOU!

2008-03-12T04:42:00.000-07:00

The BBC head of Comedy Commissioning, Lucy Lumsden, has spoken in The Stage of her frustration at how “white and male led” most of the pitches she receives are, and her desire to encourage more diversity in submissions. Here’s what she had to say on the matter.

‘The majority of all our ideas are male-led, single camera shows and they are usually white male-led. It is still a very white male industry and white males tend to write about their own lives.

‘Just as it is difficult for women to break through into comedy because they feel it is not their domain, I am sure it is incredibly difficult for black and Asian writers.

‘But if you have a show that speaks to them, suddenly that changes that. They then feel it is a show they can contribute to and not that they are working within this white male world.”

She cited the upcoming hip-hop sitcom Trexx and Flipside as redressing the balance a little.

In this she echoes recent comments made by Lenny Henry –whose married to the Vicar of Dibley and is most memorable recently for his starring role in Extras- complaining of mainstream broadcastings failure to integrate black people into their programming.

Do they have a point? Lumsden is certainly in a position to know. The question is more “why?” It’s not like there’s a shortage of talented black or Asian comic minds: The live circuit is thrumming with them. Reginald D Hunter sold out his entire Edinburgh run last year and gets a decent share of TV work, yet somehow he still feels like a loan voice as a black stand up in the UK. It doesn’t seem to be the case in America- where black-led sitcoms and sketch shows are ratings staples and black stand-ups are hugely popular, most of which achieve equal popularity over here: Chris Rock probably sold more tickets, faster than any other touring comic in the UK in 2007. So why are our own talents finding it so hard to get a commission? If the head of Comedy Commissioning at the BBC is actively looking for this stuff and it’s not appearing then something, surely, is blocking the way?

There’s a horrible sense that should the really talented stuff not get to the top then the Beeb will carry on commissioning any old shit just because it ticks the box. Which is the only possible reason for the continued appearance of Little Miss Jocelyn on the books.

Listen very carefully, ve shall say zis...etc etc

2008-03-11T06:55:00.000-07:00

There’s been an odd about-turn on ‘Allo ‘Allo…we don’t remember it being dreadfully funny on broadcast, but watching repeats over the last 5 years has forced a complete rethink: ‘Allo ‘Allo is brilliant; and now the Germans can enjoy it too…Widely reported yesterday was the acquisition of the classic sitcom by German TV station ProSiebenSat1, along with wide-ranging speculation that the German’s would (a) probably not get it, or (b) be mortally offended.

We can’t account for (a), it’ll depend entirely on how successfully the re-dubbed show will work in German, especially considering ‘Allo ‘Allo worked best when it boiled down to word-play and accent/language gags.

As for (b), we don’t recall ‘Allo ‘Allo being specifically offensive to the Germans…the German army are painted as inept buffoons who just want an easy life. As indeed are the occupied French, and the British. The majority of the German characters are actually quite likeable, Herr Flick and General Von Klinkerhoffen aside, but they themselves are very broad steretypes no different to the French Onion sellers and the cloak-and-dagger Resistance.

Still, it's difficult for us in the UK to fully appreciate the perception of the war in Germany. Seeing the Nazis as figures of fun is ingrained into our cultural memory, dating back to the war itself when Hitler and Goering would appear in the Beano as inept slapstick thickos. In Germany, where perception of the War is still wrapped in a sense of shared shame about the holocaust, programme makers have always tread carefully. "Heil Hitler"'s are still very rare on German TV, only time will tell if they still offend people when abbreviated to "kler!".

Still, it’s a nice excuse to post our all time favourite ‘All ‘Allo moment. Okay, our favourite ‘Allo ‘Allo moment not involving Vicky Michelle’s specialist film career. Ahem…

Peadogeddon!

2008-03-11T06:27:00.000-07:00

While doing our daily media reckie we spotted this picture on the Sun's website (while reading an article about Simon Pegg if you must know). How brilliant is this? We always knew the Brasseye Peado-special was a work of genius that transcends mere comedy, but it's always nice to see that seven years on Chris Morris' masterpiece is still every bit as relevant.

Why not enjoy it again.

Bruce Almighty!

2008-03-10T10:09:00.001-07:00

The thing about being a poncey media snob, as we at Thatjoke very definitely are (and proud of it too) is that you can’t stop yourself occasionally coming across as a bit of a wanky smugster. Fortunately we’ll never look quite as smug as this:

Yep, check that face out. Doesn’t it make your fists clench and your eyes feel slightly itchy? Meet Bruce Dessau, king of the Non-story and current comedy Critic-in-chief for the Evening Standard. He’s also worked for the Times and the Guardian (who persuaded him to pose for a less smackworthy banner-pic) and written a series of uninspired-looking comedy biographies.

Bruce is the master of writing lots while saying little; his blogs at the Standard’s website are lessons in stating the bleeding obvious at pointless length. Currently we’re reading his stuff whenever we want to feel annoyed that someone is being paid substantially more than us for such relentless space-wasting.

Observe:

Full Blog: Funny Ha-Ha or Funny Boohoo?

What Bruce actually means: “a new BBC4 drama series thinks all comedians are depressed mentalists, but these comics wot-I’ve-met prove otherwise”. Or to be even more succinct: “Are comedians depressed mentalists? Not all of them but some are”.

We say: Surely the BBC4 series isn’t making a sweeping generalisation, but making special cases out of these key examples (Frankie Howard, Tony Hancock, Hughie Green, the cast of Steptoe –surprisingly not Spike Milligan too) and talking about the relationship between knowledge of human understanding and self-awareness? It’s not about comedians being naturally morose, but about morose people who happen to also be comedians and thus make for a richer and more interesting drama.

But that’s a little too dark and complicated an idea and doesn’t give Bruce the chance to do some thinly veiled name dropping and make blindingly obvious points.

Full Blog: Two's Company

What Bruce actually means: “some people who work together also work separately, and double acts usually break up eventually”

What we say: Well done Brucie! Hold the front page and get the South Bank Show on the line…there’s a big scoop in this one.

Full Blog: iPlayer Changed My Life

What Bruce actually means: “isn’t the BBC iPlayer a brilliant idea, it’s changed everything over night and now I don’t need a video”

What we say: Jesus H Corbett Desso, we’re not sure what pulse your fingers on exactly, but it clearly died years ago. Leaving aside the fact the iPlayer launched about 3 months ago, it was hardly that big a revolution even then. Unofficially VOD has been around for years. Within hours of it going out, every episode of –say- That Mitchell and Webb Look, was available to download on torrents the world over and stream all over the place, and that’s been the case for at least 5 years. We’ll admit Veoh, Youtube and Daily Motion aren’t as crisp and efficient as the iPlayer itself, and were certainly a long way from official (Illegal downloading is wrong kids, and it funds terrorism, peadophilia and mass genocide.) It was difficult to get hold of, say, the One Show or an episode of Doctors, but the real Watercooler TV moments you’re talking about? They’ve been easy to get for donkeys yonks. We like the iPlayer as much as the next media-savvy web snob, but life changing? Welcome to the internet BD.

We could go on all day.

Oh go on, one more.

Full Blog: Is Doctor Who Becoming Who is The Celebrity Guest This week?

What Bruce actually means: “Doctor who likes employing comedians, and I don’t know why”

What we say: You could also say "Why is Doctor Who obsessed with Luvvie middle aged thesps (Dereck Jacobi, Simon Callow, Penelope Wilton)", or "why is Doctor Who obsessed with pretty, young actresses (Billie Piper, Freema Agyeman, Carey Mulligan, Eve Myles)". They're just people who can bring different aspects to a performance. Jessica Hynes played it completely straight, Mark Gatiss is a brilliant writer for whom Doctor Who is a dream come true, Steve Pemperton excels at grotesques. These people were brought in because they’re specific abilities related well to specific roles.

Okay, Peter Kay was just trading on a famous name and the juries out on Catherine Tate –although she was an actress before her sketch show took off, and a pretty good one at that, but it hardly proves the show is “obsessed”

We’re aware this all may seem rather petty. It’s just…if you’re going to pay a journalist to write meaningless space fillers that say nothing of any importance, we’ll do it for you at half the price.

You can't dangle the bogus carrot of Spaced in front of our face whilst riding some other donkey

2008-02-29T09:33:00.000-08:00

Post writers strike the dreaded

remake of Spaced (“McSpaced!!” screamed the fans) is grinding into action. Obviously Spaced fans are going mental about it, meanwhile we here at That Joke have decided to reserve opinion.

Okay, okay, it’s probably going to be awful. We KNOW that, we really really do. Spaced is one of the sacred gems of UK comedy. But okay, look, it’s being made now. There’s nothing any of us can do about it. We accept that Pegg/Write/Hynes aren’t involved, we accept it’s being made by McG, someone who should be banned from making television for the good of humanity, we even accept that there has only ever been one decent US remake of a UK show (no prizes for guessing which one. No, not Men Behaving Badly. Okay...okay, we’ll give you Sanford and Son as well. There are two decent remakes).

But ya know, it’s being made now and that’s an end to it. If they get a team of decent geeky pop-literate writers in, if it’s cast right, crucially if it’s not filmed live, and if it isn't called 'Spaced' it could…just about be okay. It'll just be a bit of a rip off.

It won’t be Spaced. It can't be. But it might be something we can still like just the same. There’s no point in complaining until it’s out.

Then all hell can let loose, obviously.

In the meantime, enjoy this:

PS Spaced is a gift that keeps on giving as you navigate through the tail end of your twenties...at the NME Awards Big Gig last night all I could think was "they're all so thin"...

Being Andrew Collins

2008-02-29T04:25:00.000-08:00

As much as I try my best to maintain a distinct editorial tone to this blog (wry satire and news comment reported in the 3^rd person if you must know), occasionally a more personal approach is needed, so join me as we swim into the shallow and self-indulgent waters of the first person Blog.

People have always asked me what I want to do with my life. As a child you get it a lot, then there’s careers councillors and teachers at college, and as an adult you tend to get it in job interviews, in a round-about kind of way. As a child my answer evolved from inventor to writer pretty quickly. At college it solidified into journalist, and then further into music/film/TV magazine journalist with a sideline in fiction. Then I started getting interested in radio, and then in comedy, and then I started writing comedy myself.

Which is a lot to get over in a job interview, so I started using the writer/broadcaster/editor/author Andrew Collins as a short-hand career ambition. “what I really want” I have always joked “is to be on the list of people the BBC call when they do I LOVE 2004”, or “The Top 100 Comedy Moments 1995-2005” or indeed “The Top Alternative Tunes 1985-Present”. An interesting person whose opinions are valued.

Last year Andrew Collins helpfully released a career biography (the excellent ‘That’s Me In The Corner’), allowing me to realise how far behind schedule I am. It also confirmed, even more than I actually realised, just how much Andrew had done that I’ve always wanted to achieve.

Depressingly my career thus far has been a sort of ITV3 version of his.

Observe:

Marc Burrows/ Andrew Collins career Contrast.

Andrew: Music journalist for NME, Select, Q, The Word, many more.
Marc: Music journalist for Playmusic (who went under owing me £400), Label magazine, various online

Andrew: Features Editor of NME and Select, Features Editor and Editor of Q, Editor of Empire, Film Editor for Radio Times
Marc: Arts Editor, Deputy Editor and Editor Label Magazine (Editor was a full time job, 20 page weekly magazine for a year running a team of students, elected position natually), content manager/copywriter (comedybox.tv)

Andrew: Has interviewed everyone from unknown indie bands to movie legends

Marc: Has interviewed thousands of unknown indie bands, plus the very occasional important person

Andrew: Comedy/Sketch Radio (Radio 5/1), Music Radio (6Music), Speech radio (Radio 4), Panel show (Radio 4), Podcast
Marc: Music Radio (LCR –student radio/ Roskilde Festival Radio), Speech Radio (Resonance FM), Podcast (coming)

Andrew: Written three memoirs
Marc: Er…Kept an extensive diary when I was in Hospital?

Andrew: Writes a Blog
Marc: Writes a blog. YES! Take that Collins.

Andrew: TV presenting, talking head

Marc: Producer, writer and presenter of upcoming Fuzzed.tv

Andrew: Sony award winner (for Collins and Maconie’s Hit Parade)
Marc: National Student Radio Association Award winner (Bronze Award, Best Entertainment Show)

Andrew: Partnered with Stuart Maconie, Richard Herring more recently.
Marc: Partnered incurably with Patrick Charlton

I’m not going to go into scriptwriting work, as Andrew was older than me when he did a lot of that so I don’t have to feel too bad.

So what’s the point of all this? Andrew’s recent book was about trying to fathom who he is and what he does. I’m trying to define who I am and what I want to do, and more or less they’re the same thing. I’d like to point out I’m not idolising Andrew Collins here, although I am a fan of his work. Nor do I resent him for his success, as it’s pretty well-earned. There's also things I've achieved that he hasn't. He just happens to have carved out, almost by coincidence, pretty much the exact career I’ve always wanted.

Maybe there’s something in the psyche of music-geek, TV obsessed Doctor Who fans from the East Midlands.

There’s still time to catch him anyway.

Kimmel Vs Silverman: It's War

2008-02-25T16:48:00.000-08:00

When Sarah Silverman stitched up her boyfriend, US chat show host Jimmy Kimmel, by writing a song....well, just click on the video below, okay?

Is this a fully planned double-benefiting media campaign? Is it smug American celebs washing their dirties in public? Or, as we really hope it is, two equally devious comedians enjoying getting one over on their beloved? It doesn't really matter...click below and enjoy.

Sarah's video:

And Jimmy's reply:

A New Roll Of Moving Wallpaper

2008-02-25T16:22:00.000-08:00

We're actually quite glad that Moving Wallpaper, ITV's break-the-fourth-wall-it's-post-modern-aint-it-aren't-we-clever sitcom, has got a second series. It's nice to see the Other Side showing some commitment to a comedy show instead of canning it if it underperforms by the teeniest amount.

MW hasn't been the all-conquering success some on Planet Grade probably expected, but then nor has it been the laughable disaster many a self-satisfied tossblog (guilty as charged) half expected either. We were just getting to like the characters (well...except James Lance, but then he's always a smug shit. It's what he's good at) and it would be a shame to lose those aquaintences had ITV done a Partridge on it.

The fate of the less-popular Echo Beach (less popular basically because it's shit) apparently hangs in the balance. Which begs the question: does MW need EB? Have the characters been developed enough for the show to stand alone? Will ITV admit that Echo Beach was really only there in the first place as a showcase for clever site-gags based on incidental arguments in it's sibling-show?

Herring Watch

2008-02-25T00:53:00.000-08:00

The rise of Richard Herring to legitimiser of all things funny continues this weekend in The Guardian... again. The Guide have clearly dubbed Herring the Yardstick by which all (by definition) lesser comedy is measured. This week he's casting his benevolent comedic gaze onto Pappy's Fun Club, who walk away with his blessing.

Pappy's are, of course, funnier than almost anything else in the history of the universe and fill us with so much childlike joy it's a wonder we don't shrink by a foot and a half and start playing at M.A.S.K again.

We will continue to update you on the TV Star turned man-who-was-once-on-Telly turned Alt.Comedy Treasure in the ongoing story of The Rise and Fall and Rise of Richard Herring

Burrows' Bigger Bang

2008-02-22T10:31:00.000-08:00

American sit-coms can be a bit smug, even the very good ones. It’s difficult to find someone who doesn’t like Friends, but it’s also difficult to deny its smugatude.

There’s not been a really good mainstream US sitcom since the F Word. Two and Half Men has its fans, but it’s not really all that. There’s been plenty of glossily produced comic-dramas (Everyone Hates Chris, My Name is Earl) and of course awkward alternative comedy hits (The Office, Curb, Arrested Development), but nothing really in the trad-sitcom-dodgy-set-live-studio-audience sense.

The worst offender has been James Burrows’ (he of Cheers/Will and Grace Fame) The Class, which is a rubbish concept (4^th Grade Class reunited as adults with added wierdos and snogging), badly performed and lacking in any sense of cleverness, sweetness and bite that this type of sit-com needs.

But don’t write Burrows off just yet, because last night we saw The Big Bang Theory, which has an ace concept (two geeks live opposite hot girl) and all the sweetness and bite you could want.

It’s not perfect, or particularly true to life (just because they like Star Trek and Comic Books, it doesn’t mean they’re automatically physics genius’s…we can attest to that from experience), but is fun and sweet and has that sense of slight anarchy and farce that made Will and Grace so nice.

Big Bang Theory is currently airing on E4.

A Letter To Lily Allen

2008-02-21T04:18:00.000-08:00

Dear Lily Allen

We gave Lily Allen and Friends an extra week to settle in before writing this, it seemed the decent thing to do.

It’s not working is it Lil? I mean bless you, you’re great, You really are. You’re fresh, and funny, and spunky, when you’re off the cuff you’re a treat to watch, and it genuinely is great to have you on the telly. I am genuinely fond of you. But the show…the show. It’s just no there, it doesn’t work.

If you hadn’t done this format, then obviously someone else would, and I can see why it was an easy pitch, what with all your myspace chums and entertaining blogs and all. Problem is BBC3 seem to think they can graft the internet to the side of the telly and get something wonderful and new with the best of both worlds. Like apple trees. And maybe you can…the ideal t’internet-telly format is definitely out there, skulking in the bushes waiting to be discovered. The beeb are getting there: the iPlayer maybe the best decision the BBC have made in a decade.

But BBC3’s awkward frankensteining of web two-point-whatever and anything they happen to have on their schedule just feels so false and so forced.

Your chat show guests are great and you’re doing a good job. Last week David Mitchell looked slightly bemused, a tiny bit embaressed, but seemed to be enjoying himself. Cuba Gooding Jnr obviously didn’t care where he was…up to the point you stopped the euphemisms and just talked about his cock. That was a great moment Lily, well done.

This week though, you seemed a bit hesitant and a bit unsure of yourself. Is this because of the bad reviews? Or have you maybe seen the show back yourself and realised that basing the show on web content wasn’t that great an idea in hindsight?

Here’s where you’ve got it wrong.

- The internet, especially social networking, web two-point-infinite gubbins is all about interactivity, about people taking ownership of their media and everyone’s lives being synced together. The audience need to feel part of the show.

- But your show seems to think a Social Networking/web experience can be applied to TV by showing VT’s of whatever ‘hilarious’ Mpegs have been emailed to your researcher by their Mum. Getting your audience to submit wacky facts about themselves isn't it either. You're missing the point. And didn't Graham Norton already do all of that five years ago?

Giving the kids the vote for the bands they want to see is a great idea, though hardly the most original. Replace online voting with SMS messaging and you’ve got CD:UK. It's not really enough.

Anyway, I hope this makes sense to you. Please carry on having fun, maybe try and influence some tweaks to the format. But don’t be too upset if it gets taken off. You’re doing your best and it’s not your fault.

Smile!

Marc B

That Joke Isn’t Funny Anymore.

Good News/Bad News in Movie world.

2008-02-21T04:12:00.000-08:00

Good News!
The director of Airplane! and The Naked Gun is making a satirical update of 'A Christmas Carol' with Kelsey Grammer.

Bad News!
The director of Scary Movie 3 and 4 is making a satirical update of 'A Christmas Carol' with Kelsey Grammer.

Hang on, hasn't their already been a satirical update of 'A Christmas Carol' that "lampoons contemporary American culture, particularly Hollywood"? And wasn't it really, really good?

Hmmmm.

Watch this space

Human Behaviour/ The Family of Blood: BBC3 Goes Goth

2008-02-19T10:22:00.000-08:00

BBC3’s new vision rolled on last night and we’re really beginning to feel the Russell T Davies-isation of drama as we know it. Give it a year and all telly will be like this: action, a bit risqué, cheeky, with obvious pop, and real accents. And you know what? That’s not such a band thing. Last nights’ Being Human was basically Queer As Folk meets Torchwood but, you know, without the Gay stuff. Check the pedigrees: Writer Toby Whithouse has written for Doctor Who (RTD) and Torchwood (RTD), Director Declan O’Dwyer comes from the very-much post-RTD Robin Hood, producer Matthew Bouch worked on the Sarah Jane Adventures (guess who?) and actor Russell Tovey was in the 2007 Doctor Who Christmas Special.

Being Human is BBC3’s latest try at proper, hip drama with an edge. Last weeks opening gambit –Phoo Action- was hit and miss to say the least (but still managed to get commissioned for a full series), this latest offering has a little more going for it.

In the spirit of optimism, let’s start with the good stuff. Fundamentally, Being Human is a good show. It really is. It’s a bit hammy, and there’s plenty wrong with it (of which more later), but fundamentally its beating heart is in the right place. It has teeth. It has an edge, and it says everything about the Beeb’s approach to teen-to-twenties drama in 2008.

That beating heart we mentioned comes from Werewolf Russell Tovey (George), he’s a joy. A clumsy, cockney, loveably jug-eared joy. He keeps the whole thing afloat until Ghostly Andrea Riseborough (Annie) appears, and she’s a joy too, all broad Barnsley loveliness (“Am a Gorst…am not fonder the word”). The two of them are so genuinely likeable you wish they’d come round and haunt your bedroom.

Secondly the balance between light and dark works quite well: this is, after all, meant to be a bit Penny-Dreadful, but with sex and jokes (Post Torchwood again), and it pulls it off. The climax, with the changing George locked in a room with his ex was properly scary. It was well paced, it worked really well.

The script worked too, for the most part. Witty one liners, and well thought-out characters, decent gags and situations, and some real invention splattered here and there. Like everything else it was a bit RTD, but as we said, everything is these days (and in Russell we trust.).

And if only we could stop there. If only it was just jug-eared George and lovely Annie. But it’s not. This is a show about three people. It’s also a show about three different takes on immortality and monstrosity, and it’s about three different mythical monsters: A Ghost, a werewolf, and a Vampire. And in this third all the problems lie.

Leaving aside Guy Flanagan’s performance for a sec, the problem here is in Vampirism itself. If you’re going to write about Vampires, then you need to create a Vampire Mythology: who are they? What do they do? What are the rules? No-one can ever seem to resist the gathering-in-night-clubs-plotting-world-domination-tortured-by-what-they-are- beautiful-sexy-blood-ritual-sophisticates route. Blame Blade and Bram Stoker, it’s all their fault. More to the point blame bloody Anne Rice, whose Vamprotica (™ that joke isn’t funny 2008) pretty much defined Vampire Fiction post-Interview. Buffy pulled it off, but Buffy was a bit special. Similarly now-forgotten Jack Davenport vehicle Ultra Violet managed it by making the mythology itself a bit interesting and adding a dash of pre-CSI technobabble. Being Human had none of this. There has clearly been a Vampire mythology here, and bits of it are dangled in smart suits in front of us, attempting to tantalise the audience with suggested depths of back story. You get the impression the back story probably isn’t very good.

The Vampire stuff just seemed to get in the way of the more likeable characters. Tortured Vampirism here is represented by Guy Flanagan’s Mitchell, a skinny, dashing Orlando-Bloomish chap with little hints of goth in his outfit (wristbands, jewellery), dark hooded eyes, and a slow, deep stillness to his soul that suggests something fractured and uncomfortable, but old and dangerous. Or at least it’s meant to (we know because someone goes to the trouble of describing these qualities for us in the first 5 minutes), in truth he just feels wooden. In fairness to Guy, Brad Pitt fell victim to the same problems in Interview With The Vampire: tortured introspection coming off as wooden under-acting.

He’s not all bad though: when interacting with his Pal’s, best friend George and new Friend Annie, he’s a lot more likeable and the chemistry in the trio works. It’s just when he’s taken off on his own it goes a little wrong. It’s not the worst Vampire performance ever, but it’s getting there. When the mass-Vamps are stuck in an underground nightclub you actually realise you’re watching the first Vampire-Mythology on screen that is even worse than Queen of the Damned.

And Queen of the Damned was rubbish.

There’s other stuff too: the music choices were an uninspired Ad-man’s view of what a teen/cult show needs :Amy Winehouse’ ‘Rehab’, Pulp’s ‘Common People’ and maudlin-introspection-soundtrack-hit-of-choice ‘Chasing Cars’. Although in fairness this is from the RTD school of soundtracks too. It could have been worse: it could have been all NIN and The Cure (every goth-horror ever) or sub-Dawsons Creek acoustic warbledge (Buffy). It’s such a wasted opportunity though. What about little tounge in cheek nods: ‘For Lovers’ by Wolfman and Pete Doherty? ‘Ghosts’ by Laura Marling? Anything by the Howling Wolves or Vampire Weekend? It would have added a sense of fun and a little more genuine youth credibility.

Thing is, we genuinely think we could get into this. There’s enough tantalising little snippets to explore (how did Annie die? What happens after death? Why is she still here? How did George become a Wolf? How old is Mitchell? Why does he object to his Vampish instincts? How come that bloke from Hustle gets in everything?), and the answers could hopefully be intigueing. The difficulty is walking the line between great character drama and spooky gothed-out cult hit. It can be done (Buffy and Angel) but it’s very very hard when dealing with these subjects. But if Phoo Action can be picked up, then surely this is a safer prospect?

Herring On the Rise

2008-02-18T07:23:00.000-08:00

Somewhere along the line Richard Herring stopped being a 90’s comedian who was once on the telly, and became the kind of comic’s-comic whose name is mentioned as a benchmark of all that is witty, modern and great about the live comedy circuit.

Evidence? This weeks Guardian Guide mentioned him twice in articles about other comedians. First in a preview for Colin and Fergus show at the Hen and Chickens, Herring’s name is dropped in when it’s revealed the duo once shared a flat with him in Edinburgh, then again in a preview for Toby Hadoke's upcoming tour, this time a complimtary quote from the man himself. That was it. Using the name Richard Herring to prove the comedy pedigree of a lesser-know act.

That definitely says something.

When Lee and Herring drifted away from each other the smart money was on the former to carry on the ascent. He was the straight man and already had a solid reputation as a stand up in his own right, Herring was less known and had an on-screen persona based on being very silly and excitable, he didn’t quite fit the mood. And initially this has proved true: Stewart Lee did some great stand up, Jerry Springer The Opera, more great stand up and got voted 41^st best Stand Up of all time (also the name of his current show). At some point in the last couple of years he became one of those under-ground success stories whose name is whispered in hushed tones of comedy genius. Should this continue he’ll probably end up as the British Bill Hicks, and he deserves it.

Richard’s progress has been patchier: a series of well received one-man shows, culminating with ‘Talking Cock’, which hit a nerve (or at least a vein) with the comedy public. There was even a book. Then there was writing work with Al Murray’s ‘Time Gentlemen Please’, Radio 2’s historical sketch show ‘That Was Then This Is Now’ and more recently writing and acting in the sitcom ‘You Can Choose Your Friends’ for ITV. On top of that there’s been panel-shows a plenty on Radio 4, and a return to straight stand-up, culminating with his latest show ‘Oh Fuck! I’m 40’, which pretty much sold out every night in Edinburgh –something Herring has done quite a lot in recent year. As he himself will readily admit, Stewart Lee was selling out a much bigger venue, but the point still stands.

Still until now he’s not really had the respect, his has not been a name that has been dropped to the same extent as Simon Munnery, Rob Newman or, of course, Stewart Lee (incidentally all Avalon alumni, though only Munnery and Herring are still represented), but something has shifted. The Guardian episode is a case in point: Herring has become a reference point, a symbol. He is becoming underground comedy royalty, and it’s justly deserved. Hopefully this will mean more selling out at Edinburgh this year and more Herring on telly. Of course we could be wrong, but I think if Channel 4 where to repeat their 100 Best Stand Up list in a year or so, Herring will feature. Maybe even at number 40.

It’s well deserved. Richard Herring is in a league that really only includes himself and his former partner (and possible Simon Munnery), comics who can effortlessly deconstruct what makes us laugh whilst –crucially- continuing to make us laugh. He can combine the very silly with very incisive. He makes dick jokes that tell us something about why dick jokes are funny, and yet still remain good dick jokes. You can laugh at him, with him and at yourself all at once.

Anyway, his current tour, the excellent Oh Fuck! I’m 40, is well underway and we’d recommend you go:

20th Feb St David's Hall, Cardiff
22nd Feb South Street Arts Centre, Reading - SOLD OUT
23rd Feb Gala Theatre, Durham
24th Feb Tobacco Factory, Bristol
28th Feb Arts Theatre, London
29th Feb Arts Theatre, London
2nd March The Comedy Cavern, Bath
3rd March Farnham Maltings Arts Centre, Surrey
4th March Little Civic, Wolverhampton
7th March Jersey Arts Centre
8th March Tripod Dublin
9th March The Tron, Glasgow
11th March Just The Tonic, Nottingham,
12th March Hilarity Bites, Darlington
13th March West End Centre, Hampshire
15th March The Y Theatre, Leicester
16th March Assembly Rooms, Derby
17th March Mac-The Theatre, Birmingham
19th March The Junction, Cambridge
20th March Komedia, Brighton
21st March Cardiff DVD record
24th April Black Box, Belfast
3rd May Chipping Norton Theatre
10th May York

Thursdays are Not funny

2008-02-15T06:26:00.000-08:00

Comedy website Chortle are reporting on the fall in viewing figures hitting BBC2's 'Thursdays Are Funny', currently consisting of Nevermind the Buzzcocks, Stephen Mangan vehicle Never Better and Little Miss Jocelyn.

Apparently last night the Buzzcocks clips show did best (2 millions), followed by Never Better (823,000) with LMJ being hit worse (799,000).

The beeb are blaming the combination of Valentines day and Football on Channel 5.

They're wrong: It's because Buzzcocks was a best-of show, Never Better is wholly unremarkable and Little Miss Jocelyn is the single worst thing to ever happen to terrestrial TV, ever.

Hopefully Mitchell and Webb will pull it back a bit next week.

That Mitchell and Webb Trailer

2008-02-14T09:02:00.000-08:00

The BBC has released trailers…well, actually whole sketches for the impending and long expected new series of That Mitchell and Webb Look (wot won a BAFTA you know), they can be viewed on the BBC website , and then for the purpose of further reading there’s one on Youtube.

So far we can assume that series two won’t be drifting too far away from series one, notably because all the best bits will have been taken directly from That Mitchell and Webb Sound, the brilliant Football sketch especially.

This is no bad thing really…let’s face it the audience for sketch shows on Radio 4 have always been tiny compared to the TV upgrades, and as the writing in series 2 of …Sound was notably improved from series 1, hopefully …Look will follow the same pattern.

It’s nice to see the new series materialising anyway, though it’s no surprise it’s been so long in the making: the duo have been preoccupied with Peep Show’s fourth outing on Channel 4, a third series of …Sound for Radio 4 and a feature film (and while we’re on the subject: Magicians got a lukewarm response, but is actually a thoroughly decent and actually quite charming Britcom) although alas not for Film4, not to mention David Mitchells appearance on every single panel show ever. With Peep Show season 5 green lit (Amazon are already selling it) and the new series of ...Look Baftabound for 2009 (and who knows, maybe a fouth for ...Sound and even a pick up of Daydream Believers), and David Mitchell apparently contractually obliged to appear on telly twice a week, there is no end in site for the thinking mans Ant and Dec.

Indeed Mitchell and Webb fever is very much hitting the UK. Even The Sun are getting in on the act. To get you really excited check this breathless quote from the BBC Press office, reportedly a joint quote form both boys.

"We're really excited about the new series. It's packed with new ideas, characters, and most of all, jokes. Many of the sketches are far weirder and more ambitious than anything in the first series, but we've still found room for down-and-out super-sleuth Sir Digby Chicken-Caesar and several new takes on Numberwang."

And if that doesn't get you in the mood, nothing will.

That football sketch in full:

Happy Valentines Day from Bjork

2008-02-14T05:20:00.000-08:00

Far be it from us to self promote, but this has just been stuck up over at our day job and it's rather lovely. Joanna Neary is one to watch, and has been for a while. She's ace.

Stick valentine soppyness to anyone that gives a crap.

Click here to have a gander

New BBC3 Reviewed: Phoo Action.

2008-02-13T10:31:00.000-08:00

The relaunched BBC3 kicked into gear last night with an emphasis on shiny bright colours, shiny bright people and of course Web two-point-whatever (surely we should be due an upgrade by now?) that TV really should have cottoned onto two years back at least.

Two shows last night defined the new look channel, the much-anticipated (although in some cases only to smirk) Lily Allen and Friends, more on which later, and flagship 'drama' Phoo Action, and that’s quite the oddest prospect yet.

First up was the shock that Jose Vanders was introducing the programmes. Jose is a fresh-faced (looking particularly well scrubbed last night) and obscenely talented singer-songstress who we happen to have actually met a few times. Last seen supporting GoodBooks just before Christmas, it was a jolt to see her fronting TV, but then letting anyone on the box is what BBC3 is all about these days, and besides she did a pretty decent job of it. To investigate Jose a bit more click here.

Phoo Action is a really, really odd show. And not because of its content: Basketball-headed villains, blue mutant henchman, magic hotpants. These are par for the course. No, what made Phoo Action so odd is that, almost 24 hours later, we still have no idea if it was

a) Bubblegum-fresh, entertaining and cool

b) Absolutly fucking awful.

Seriously we have no idea. One moment you’re drifting along on a tide of eye candy and a great soundtrack allowing your nether-brain to get some sleep while your eyes and what passes for your consciousness are distracted by the bright lights and pretty colours. The next you’re cowering in startled dis-belief that something so brain-rottingly shit could be allowed onto your screen.

For an explanationwe should look to the committee-led scientifically proven box-ticking that went into toddlershaped mindfuck BooBah in 2004 – a show that mesmerised the under 4’s but seemed like a psychedelic migraine to anyone older. Like that show each gurgling voice, each sparkly explosion, each musical chime exists only for the ears of a very specific demographic. If you’re outside it then it seems senseless. So if you’re under 20 Phoo Action was probably quite good, if you’re over 30 it’s bonkers, and not in a good way... and if you’re in the middle it doesn’t quite feel right.

There are things it does universally right: thanks to Jamie Hewlett's unique imagination the whole thing looked spectacular. Jamie Winstone seems like one to watch and looks great in hotpants and a red wig, and the soundtrack was a well-chosen mash of electro-new and stompy-old (CSS and Supergrass at either end). The nightclub dance in particular was a great moment.

On the other hand, for a character who is meant to be an ass-kicking, breakdancing, masked kung-fu cop, Terry Phoo is a disappointingly wet lead. His fighting and his dancing didn’t really fizzle at all.

An interesting and tone-setting start for BBC3, let’s see where it takes us.

‘Doctor Doctor’ Jokes Take New Meaning

2008-02-13T03:58:00.000-08:00

The League Of Gentleman’s Steve Pemberton is to appear in the upcoming series of Doctor Who. This isn’t a huge surprise: Steve’s fellow Royston Vaseyian Mark Gatiss wrote one of the stand-out episodes of the Regenerated show, ‘The Unquiet Dead’ in Series One. He also penned the slightly disappointing ‘Idiots Lantern’ in series 2 and acted in Series 3. Obviously he’s passing the torch over to Pemperton who will play a mysterious character called “Lux”.

The Sun is quoting an insider from the show as saying

“Steve is an obvious choice for Doctor Who bosses because he looks so funny and he’s used to playing weird characters from his time in League Of Gentleman.”

They probably have a point: Pemberton was always the oddest looking Gent in the League, hence his turns as Cab-driving tranny Barbara (a bit scary), pig-feeding, hiker-burning shop-keeping wicker wife Tubbs (quite scary) and careers councillor Pauline (Terrifying).

Pemberton also had a small part in Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, based on the book by Douglas Adams, who was a writer and script-editor on Doctor Who during the Tom Baker years.

No-doubt plans are already afoot to find a role for Reece Shearsmith, who –now we come to think of it- wouldn’t make a bad stab at the lead when David Tennant retires. Watch this space.

...must have GSOH. or a Grammy.

2008-02-11T05:32:00.000-08:00

Women will often claim that making them laugh is a high priority in fanciable fellas. It’s not true, although most women won’t admit it. Goofball one liners and wry satire are not really the direct route to a ladies special parts (believe us on this, it’s from experience), they’re more optional extras. GSOH is a nice addition, but tall-dark-and-handsome will usually win out in the short term. Being the funny one is really the quick route to neutral-male-friend territory (and no-one wants that). If it were really the case people like David Mitchell would be luckier in love and Benny Hill wouldn’t have died alone. It’s probably for the best…some of the funniest bits of sitcom history come out of frustration with this very truth (See Peep Show, Men Behaving Badly, The Office and –with no small irony baring in mind what follows- Flight Of The Conchords).

But there are exceptions. David Walliams is bafflingly popular with certain C-list blondes, Russell Brand is fighting women off with a stick nightly, though not really with very much enthusiasm it has to be said. Noel Fielding bestrides Camden’s teenage girl population like a skinny-jeaned Colossus of Rhodes, and we know from personal experience that every woman in Russell Howards management company follows him around like a puppy. Indeed, so tempting are the boy wizards come-to-bed eyes (one more so than the other...sorry) he even has gay fan fiction. Then there's the Comedy Groupies website, the existance of which pretty much disproves everything we're saying, and so is being ignored. Although we don't think any of these girls really means it when push comes to shove.

Latest to add to the canon are Grammy Award winning electro-folk-parody pioneers and Kiwi comedy genius’s Flight of The Conchordes who are so jaw droppingly fanciable Polly Vernon dedicated four pages to them in Observer Woman yesterday, including such quotes as

“McKenzie is straight-forwad gobsmackingly beautiful, fine-featured and flawlessly skinned.”

While completely air-brushing their Radio 2 show –which pre-dated the HBO TV version by two years and featured almost the same plots- but which nevertheless is quite endearing in its “fannish gibbering” (Polly’s words).

Polly goes on to muse on their appeal…

“maybe we’re tiring, finally, of self-entitled self-consciously powerful men, and beginning to fancy something a little less obvious”.

Which probably means there’s hope for us all. Although it would be a shame, if you think about it. Where would Peep Show or Flight Of The Conchords be if nice guys stopped finishing last? Still, there’s hope for us all.

And for the record...we think Rhys Darby is just a hot as Brett and Jermaine.

Review: Eddie Izzard, New Material Night at the Arts Theatre

2008-02-07T05:01:00.000-08:00

Eddie Izzard is growing old gracefully. For his new material night in the teeny tiny Arts Theatre, off Leicester Square, it’s out with the mini-skirts and slap and in with a smart gut-concealing jackets, expensive looking jeans and the early stages of a salt and pepper beard (“I’m an off duty Transvestite”). Eddie turns 46 today and he’s slipping comfortably into middle age. It suits him.

The act is more grown up too. Baring in mind this is try-out material we can’t expect too much, but there’s a definite shift in tone. Those mammoth leaps of imagination feel more controlled, there’s more of an agenda.

Eddie ‘08 is more concerned with themeing his material than previous shows. Perenial Izzard favourite God is back at the forefront, and this time we’re very defiantly, 100% absolutely sure he definitely probably doesn’t exist. Eddie weaves the evolution stuff showcased at last years Secret Policeman’s Ball, which has got a bit sharper and a bit funnier (“it goes Monkey, Monkey, Monkey, Monkey, Monkey, Monkey, YOU”) with the more obvious holes in creationism, biblical dogma and the Ten Commandments. It’s nothing new: Eddie Izzard shows have concerned themselves with evolution, Noah’s Arc, and what God had to do with Dinosaurs since the early 90’s. This time round though, there’s definitely more of an agenda. Maybe it’s his film and TV career and the fact he’s so often in the States, where Creationism and Intelligent Design are social and political hot potatoes. Maybe as he gets older his thoughts have got more profound. Maybe he just found he really had something to say this time around. Whatever the reason there are fleshes in tonight’s set that reveal a genuine anger at the silliness in modern religion.

The other major theme is technology and the IT society. Wikipedia gets a thorough going over, in what seems a love/hate relationship with the internet and access to information. Oh, and there’s Macs Vs PC's too. Eddie Izzard loves Macs. If this show was sponsored by Apple it wouldn’t be that big a surprise. Eddie loves his Mac, he especially loves his iPhone. One anecdote has him at a table reading with Tom Cruise when all he wants to do is show everyone his iPhone.

It nearly comes across as smug, but he pulls it off just about.

Oh, and there’s Jam. God has Jam, Wikipedia has Jam, there’s Jam on the iPhones, in the desert, it’s smeared everywhere. Jars of the stuff. Jam, jam, jam, jam, jam, jam, jam. Because some things never change, no matter how old you get.

There’s still some brushing up to do. There’s moments of brilliance –two hunters conversing in cod-latin is pure, distilled Izzard- but not yet any of those insane, quotable moments (“Cake or Death”, “death star canteen”) that even the weaker shows have had.

There are some holes here: the stream of consciousness errrrrrrrrrrrring isn’t as exciting as it once was, and his brain doesn’t seem to kick out the more bizarre stuff at quite the velocity it once did (Russell Howard and Bill Bailey both do it better now). But with the material shaping up to be smarter and sharper than before and with more work to do, 2008 could be a vintage Izzard year.

Dave Gorman's America Unchained: Review

2008-02-06T10:19:00.000-08:00

Dave Gorman’s excellent ‘America Unchained’ went out on More 4 last night and was rather a cute and fuzzy experience for all. As usual it was the depth and the detail that makes a Gorman project transcend type (here sincere travelogue, in the past whacky misadventure) and become something more thoughtful, funnier and more beautifully observed and constructed than it really has any right to be.

A few interesting points. When Daves' injured camera-woman is swapped for an able-bodied camera-man (please note there is no intended comment on Gender Vs Ability here at all) the quality of the footage leaped ahead. The last two thirds of the film were beautifully shot. Next time he’ll know who to take.

We also feel compelled to note the irony of Dave searching for an America free of overt commericalism and trying to stick it to the large corporations sacrificing the personal approach in favour of the big bucks: Dave Gorman is managed by Avalon, a large company known to chase the dollar in any given situation. It is a little like marching in a ‘Meat is Murder’ protest while being sponsored by Burger King.

Still, that isn't really a criticisim. It’s almost impossible to genuinely find a criticisim. In this age where the beloved telly has been exposed a filthy liar there’s always a little voice at the back of the mind telling you “he couldn’t really have found an independent soda-fountain closing on the same day he was in town, surely?” But with Dave Gorman you really hope so. You really want to believe. Because Dave Gorman is a truth-teller, a story teller (and occasionally but surprisingly not that ofte, a joke teller.) You want to believe him because you like him.

And I do believe. Dave Gorman makes you believe.

A wonderful little film then, and one that will make you feel better about yourself, the world, and shockingly, about America.

Buy the DVD here.

Cake or death, Death Star canteen, Jam, etc

2008-02-05T05:10:00.000-08:00

Eddie Izzard has announced another run of late work in progress shows at London's teeny-weeny-tiny Arts Theatre this week (Tues, Weds, Friday). If there's more than one of you though, don't bother trying for tickets though, they're almost certainly sold out by now. However if you don't mind sitting alone you may well be able to secure yourself a seat here.

It is with not a little smugness that we can reveal we did get a seat and will report back on Thursday.

We'll cut off your Johnson

2008-02-04T08:03:00.000-08:00

Most people will agree that Boris Johnson is fine material for a comic. He could almost of been put on this earth by a joking Deity purely to give us someone to snigger at, the bumbling oaf.

But some comedians have to take it one step further. Tom Greeves is actually working for him.

There are, as far as we can see, three possible reasons for this. And let's just say in advance that we haven't seen Tom Greeves, he may well be a great stand up and a very funny man.

So...option A
Tom Greeves has realised that if Boris becomes Mayor of London he'll make a string of highly public mistakes and every comeidan will benefit from the vast wealth of material across all media. He is helping to create a comedy renaisance.

Option B.
Tom Greeves is a character created by a particularly convincing comic, aiming to generate amusing situations and bring down Boris from within. He's clearly worked hard on it, he's even written a blog in character, full of the most horrible neo-conservative tripe.

Option C.
His absurdly right wing persona is actually real, he's genuinely lending his skills to a Tory Mayoral-candidate largely seen is a joke, and really means it when he says things like this:

"I am fed up to fury of being told that I should care about “the vulnerable”… [and] I don't want my own kids to be schooled amongst the thick and idle"

Surely not?

There IS a comedy God...

2008-02-04T03:22:00.000-08:00

...And he loves us.
Thatjoke favourites Richard Herring and Andrew Collins have begun producing fortnightly news-review podcasts, currently from Richards sofa on a laptop, rebooting their hugely enjoyable 6Music sunday morning reviews from a wee while back.

It's not often you get to feel nostalgic for 6Music and early 90's late night Radio One (when Lee and Herring were doing a radio show as well as the early radio version of Fist Of Fun, and Andrew Collins was working with Stuart Maconie on Collins and Maconie's Hit Parade. Interestingly Herrings formertive partner Stewart Lee talks about Collins once-radio-comrade Stuart Maconie in his current show. He compares him to an all knowing watcher.) all at the same time, but now you can, and personally we're revelling in it.

The delightful 45 minutes(ish) touches on such favourite 2007/2008 news staples as the Madeline Mystery, Chris Langham and the brutish disregard our policeforce has for modern day comedians.

You can hear the brilliantly titled Collings and Herrin here.

This comedy geek is going for a lie down brought on by excitement not felt since that Doctor Who where Sarah Jane came back.

Sorry

2008-02-04T03:17:00.000-08:00

Apologies for the near-two week gap in updates, there have been various work related issues to attend to. Things are very much back on course.

Apologies.

More BBC Threesome

2008-01-22T05:11:00.000-08:00

Some more details on the BBC3 Revamp we mentioned earlier. Chortle have done some more digging on the Comedy content.

Other comedy tidbits to look out for include Trexx and Flipside, a "multi-channel sitcom" about Hip Hop. Although what will be "Multi Channel" has not been revealed. Another, Coming Of Age, has been written by 19 year old First Year student Tim Dawson, although early reports have cast it as a proto-Two Pints, which frankly we probably don't need. There's also another sketchshow called Scallywagga.

Feel it closing in, feeling it closing in

2008-01-22T04:36:00.000-08:00

The unrelenting and unavoidable move to crush analogue in all its forms (It's called the 'Digital Switchover') continues apace, with leading high street electronics now only stocking televisions with built in Digital TV. It's apparently called future proofing, and combined with the death of the video recorder and the cassette tape, is just another line drawn under the appealing hiss of the analogue age.

There are those still keeping the home fires burning bright and resisting the digital revolution though: Some people still need a Black and White TV Licence .

Unfortunately once Analogue telly is switched off their bill goes up over 300% as a set-top box will automatically count as colour TV. Which seems a bit hard, as people who only have a black and white telly are probably the ones who can least afford their bills to triple.

BBC Threesome

2008-01-22T03:01:00.000-08:00

BBC 3, the channel that bought you Can Fat Teens Hunt, are aiming to revolutionise the concept of Television as we know it, or at least that’s what they’d have us believe by the tone of controller Danny Cohen over at Media Guardian.

Apparently the channel will ‘Simulcast’ (a point right there for anyone playing Bullshit Bingo: The Media Edition) all of its programming on ‘Multiple Platforms’. Which actually means “it’ll be on the internet at the same time it’s on the telly”.

Give them their dues, this genuinely is an innovation in British TV. No Channel outside of rolling news has dared to broadcast directly on the web, although it does feel a little like the Beeb are Guinea-pigging the concept with the channel they risk least with.

Cohen’s breathless excitement is evident:

"At BBC3 we should be known for pioneering risk, and be obsessed with all things new - new talent, new programmes, and a new relationship between television and the internet.

The thinking behind this rebrand of the channel is that we have, in effect, created a BBC3 world in which our content can move seamlessly between TV, online and mobile.

We have a fantastic lineup of programmes and we are going to make them available wherever young people want them."

Which is all well and good until you look at the new schedule, which despite a fancy new logo (we’ll miss those little blob things) doesn’t feel all that new and risky to us: docu-soaps on single Mums, teen pregnancy and modelling, make over shows “with a twist”, returning American imports like Heroes, a refresh of the old-as-the-hills comedy variety show with The Wall, and a new series of Gavin and Stacey, which admittedly did deserve a second go as it’s quite fine. All of which could probably be pretty decent in their own place, but are hardly unfamiliar BBC3 ground.

There a few genuine innovations. Lily Allen And Friends could actually be quite good…Lily herself is an engaging enough personality, although they’ve been cagey about the format so we’ll hold off until we’ve seen it. The Wrong Door is being described as a “sketch show with CGI”, but quite what that means is anyone’s guess. It won’t be as good as Modern Toss, that’s for sure. Then there’s this

“New entertainment format Upstaged will be a mixture of talent show, stamina and social networking, which Cohen has described as "risky".”

Which sounds horrible.

Best of all is the drama:

Six drama pilots will include Phoo Action, written by Tank Girl creator Jamie Hewlett; thriller The Things I Haven't Told You; Being Human, a tale of a vampire, ghost and werewolf who share a house; and Mrs In-Betweeny, created by Shameless writer Paul Abbott and Caleb Ranson.

The proposition of a drama by the man that draws Gorillaz definitely spikes our interest and the Vampire thing could well be good.

BBC3 then. There’s more to it than crap docusoaps, Two Pints... and Doctor Who Confidential, and if you’re too lazy to leave the computer and go to the Telly you don’t have to. It’s the future.

Falling in love with Falling Off The Lavender Bridge

2008-01-21T03:19:00.001-08:00

All hail the first great album of 2008: Lightspeed Champion’s Falling Off The Lavender Bridge. It’s out today, it’s far better than it has any right to be. Buy it, enjoy it, and then go and buy anything you can find by Emmy the Great, as her backing vocals here are half the charm.

This time next week Rodders, we may not be millionaires but we will own series One & Two of Only Fools... providing we buy the Sun

2008-01-21T02:59:00.001-08:00

The Sun starts giving away the first two series of Only Fools And Horses today (Monday 21^st

January). They’re free, but there is a moral cost: buying the Sun.

It does give John Sullivan the chance to explain the post millennial Christmas specials:

“A lot of people ripped into them. But what they didn’t understand was that it wasn’t meant to be the actual show. We weren’t being very serious.”

Are we really supposed to believe that Sullivan wrote those shows meaning them to sub-standard? Or do you think he might, just might, be trying to cover the fact that despite the efforts of those involved they simply weren’t as good.

Still, as has we have pointed out before, Del Boy falling through the bar is the ultimate pinnacle of comedic achievement according to most of the British public, and who are we to argue with them?

Lies, lies, Damned Lies

2008-01-18T04:05:00.000-08:00

More lies and moral filth coming out of the BBC as television continues to be to modern media what the Ottoman Empire was to 19^th Century Europe. But this time, we don’t know who is to blame.

Following Blue Petergate, Blue Petergate II, Comic Reliefgate, 6Musicgate and more, it turns out there is still deception bubbling under over at Broadcasting house. Of course the BBC are trying their best to stamp it all out and make sure we find out from them, rather than from some irritating Tab. Next week we’ll find out where the blame lies. What could it be? Was the recent Two Pints live episode really entirely CGI? Is Radio 5 Live actually being broadcast out of Bombay using talented and under paid Indian impressionists? Did John Simm not get transported back to the 70’s to fight crime after all? Is it true that Dot Cotton is really a do-gooding Babyshambles Fan called June? Where will it all end?

Secretly most people will probably agree with Russell T Davies in discussion with Mark Lawson earlier this week (available on the iPlayer until Wednesday, heartily recomended) when he described himself as being actually quite impressed with the resourcefulness of overworked studio telly-peeps making snap decisions on live TV. And if Russell says so, it must be true. He is the last honest man in showbiz.

Let’s face it, the BBC’s earnest attempts to cut out the noddys, apologise to the Queen and restore some of that seeped faith are all very arguable, but most reasonable people were probably happier when the wool was pulled over their eyes. And besides, the problems over at ITV (X-Factor Gate, GMTVgate, late night phone in Quiz-O-Gate, Ant and Dec o’gate) are far far worse.

The end is nigh, we’re all doomed.

Newton Fuckerner

2008-01-18T03:25:00.000-08:00

In a year that was characterised by missing blonde children, the unavoidable slide towards world religous war and general unpleasantness Newton Faulkner is still the worst thing about 2007.

Brit Pop Now Again

2008-01-17T06:18:00.000-08:00

It's not often we get to name check Damon Albarns seminal 1995 showcase twice in the same week as a headline, but it just fits so well.

Anyway, the latest in a never ending use of the headline "Oasis Vs Blur- The Rematch" (will it ever end?) has popped up in todays Daily Star. Apparently The Weakest Link are keen to do a Britpop reunion with the stars of the 90's indie scene. A supposed BBC "inside source" has said.

"If we can pull this off it would be unbelievable. It’s been over a decade since this lot have even been in the same room as each other. To see them lined up next to one another with Queen of Mean Anne Robinson giving them stick would be amazing. It’s sure to ignite old rivalries, which would be TV gold. Noel admits he’s a Weakest Link fan."

Let's face it. It's never going to happen. According to The Star, the Weakest Link are after:

Rick Witter (Shed Seven)
Justine Frischman (Elastica)
Jarvis Cocker (Pulp)
Damon Albarn (Blur)
Alex James (Blur)
Noel Gallagher (Oasis)
Liam Gallagher (Oasis)
Gaz Coombes (Supergrass)
James Dean Bradfield (Manic Street Preachers).

Can anyone realistically see this happening? Nevermind the Gallaghers- Damon, Justine and Brett in the same room? How is that ever going to be likely. Damon is hardly game for a laugh and hardly needs the appearance fee. The Gallagher Brothers won't go near it. Alex might do it for a lark, but it would depend on his mood. JDB would hopefully have more integrity.

It's not going to replace Neighbours very well, now, is it?

For what it's worth, Thatjoke is predicting that a Britpop Weakest Link special will happen, however the line up will be closer to this:

Rick Witter
Gaz Coombes
One of Tony McCarrol/Guigsy/Bonehead/Andy White
Alex James
Justine
Louise Wener
Nicky Wire (he won't be able to resist)
Sonia From Echobelly
John Power

For what it's worth, we think The Wire would hammer it.

Fossilised mobile content at The Gym

2008-01-17T02:56:00.001-08:00

In a surprisingly savvy move (has Michael Grade actually started expanding his imagination past the ad breaks?) ITV have announced a new multi-platform comedy series, The Gym, to start this Monday.

With the frankly unfathomable mind of Boosh compatriot Rich Fulcher at the controls there’s definite potential for this to be special. According to Media Guardian, the show is set in a Gym and will feature such Fulcherish inventions as Eduardo The Warrior Cleaner and a buff personal trainer called…Gee. Also on board is Watson & Oliver/Plus One’s Ingrid Oliver.

The show will be downloadable on mobiles, with an online version available a week after. Whether it’ll get a proper telly showing is unclear, but we all know TV is a dead medium (regardless of what the BBC say) so it doesn’t matter really. (UPDATE According to BBCi it will indeed be on TV, dead medium or not) It’s a bold move by the channel, whose comedy output tends to be a bit piss poor and everyman (although we have great hopes for ITV2’s Laura, Ben and Him), and whose grasp of next generation Webbyness has not really stretched past scamming school girls out of SMS cash, oh and Hot Desk. Frankly it’s hard to trust a channel whose media player doesn’t work on Macs, in a time when the BBC iPlayer is kicking ass so much.

It’s also worth mentioning that mobile led video content has never really taken off, although that might be because it’s often not very good, as the Red Dwarf ‘Mobisodes’ (The Gym is apparently a ‘Mobicon’) have shown. Still, Rich Fulcher’s anarcho-silliness is a good indication that something special might, just might, happen here.

Of course baring in mind Fulcher’s occasional tendancy to misfire and the fact that, well, this is ITV after all, it might not be all that.

It’s an interesting move though.

All Telly needs is Love, Money and more John Simm

2008-01-16T10:13:00.000-08:00

Interesting and enlightening view from inside the BBC courtesy of Director General Mark Thompson, over on Guardian Unlimited, although it really only makes two points. Number one is

“We’re not liars honest, TV is still great, we make great TV, telly is the best, Telly is King, long live Telly, stop complaining, we’re clearly ace, we love Telly and so do you so stop moaning. Watch telly, because telly is brilliant. You should trust the Telly. Telly telly telly telly.”

Well that’s what we got from it anyway. Point number two:

“Give us more money. MORE MONEY! We need money. There’s not enough money. Stop complaining and give us money. I want to rub my naked BBC telly-flavoured body in the publics greasy cash. We need more money, give us money now. Telly is great, telly telly telly”

Okay, his actually words were

"There' s no point crying crocodile tears about less public service broadcasting," he said. "What quantity of public service broadcasting do you want and how is it to be paid for?"

But we think our version gets the point across better.

Tied into both of these points seems to be a sincere attempt to change the way Aunty Beeb deals with politics, giving it a more even handed and positive slant and do for Politics what Doctor Who and Life On Mars have done for drama. Which, if extended logically, means involving John Simm as much as possible. Also worth noting that Doctor Who has killed off the Prime Minister and over-turned the Government in all three of it’s post-comeback seasons.

Make of that what you will.

Brit Pop Now: Everything is Average Now Days

2008-01-14T15:40:00.000-08:00

Please note Thatjoke have read no other Blogs on this subject to avoid contamination. It's all out own work. Many thanks.

Well it's back patting time again :the Brit Award nominations have been announced, and if nothing else they prove what a weak year it has been for music in general and british music in particular. In the words of Bart Simpson... "Let's start at the top and take it away..."

British Male Solo Artist
Jamie T
Mark Ronson
Mika
Newton Faulkner
Richard Hawley

Do you see what we mean? What is there to inspire here? Newton fucking Faulkner? Good God, do we really need a British Jack Johnson? Jamie T is a worthy mention but smacks of tokenism. Hawley is obviously wonderful, but doesn't stand a chance. Ronson will probably take it, but he doesn't deserve too: no-one that talented, well connected, wealthy, successful and good looking deserves more prize.

Will Win: Mark Ronson
Should Win: Hawley
Awol: McCartney's album and output this year have been good enough to earn him a place with the real nominations.

British Female Solo Artist
Bat For Lashes
Kate Nash
KT Tunstall
Leona Lewis
PJ Harvey

Slightly better fare here. Poor Natasha BFL doesn't stand a chance, but her album easily outsrips any here. PJ and KT are making the numbers up, it's between Leona and Kate, and will depend on whether the panel fancy going popularist or not. Leona probably deserves it though.

Will Win: Leona Lewis
Should Win: Bat For Lashes

British Group
Arctic Monkeys
Editors
Girls Aloud
Kaiser Chiefs
Take That

Again it's hardly earth shaking news is it? Arctic Monkeys probably won't get it, they're way to 2006, Editors don't deserve it really. They're not good enough. Girls Aloud, obviously, rock. Kaiser Chiefs are nowhere in the same league. Take That should walk with it. Their comeback has been one of the best thought through operations in recent years and the waves of genuine pubic affection shuld keep them afloat. Damn it, they deserve it.

Will Win: Take That
Should Win: Take That
Awol: Aside from the hundreds of smaller acts deserving of a mention it's a surprise to not see Muse here. This is the year they headlined Wembley after all. Also of ne is the lack of Bloc Party.

British Album
Arctic Monkeys - 'Favourite Worst Nightmare'
Leona Lewis - 'Spirit'
Mark Ronson - 'Version'
Mika - 'Life In Cartoon Motion'
Take That - 'Beautiful World'

Has it really been this weak? Arctic Monkeys don't deserve it. Their record was too willfully awkward (as are they come to think of it), Leona's wasn't strong enough all the way through, Mika's was just irritating with the exception of maybe 'Billy Brown'. Which means it's between Ronson and Take That. Take That's album was a decent all-rounder, and it's a fair bet they'll take it. For sheer freshness though it should go to Ronson. Actually didn't that Take That album come out in 2006?

Will Win: Take That
Should Win: Mark Ronson
Awol: GoodBooks released the best indie-pop album of the year, Bloc Party also had a good chip at it.

British Breakthrough Act
Bat For Lashes
Kate Nash
Klaxons
Leona Lewis
Mika

Actually the toughest of this years to judge. Which is why Radio 1 listeners are doing it for them. Leona's been the more successful, obviously, but Kate Nash has more pluck. Klaxons have the best album of the lot, but Bat For Lashes is a trendier name to drop. Its tight.

Will Win: Kate Nash
Should Win: Klaxons
Awol: GoodBooks again!

British Live Act
Arctic Monkeys
Kaiser Chiefs
Klaxons
Muse
Take That

So unsure are the judges on this one, it's been handed over to Radio 2 to deal with. Or maybe it's because no-one really cares about it. Hey who. Despite Klaxons ability to rip any venue a new electro arse-hole, and Take That's big-production-well-loved-cuddlyness this one has to be a shoe in for Muse.

Will Win: Muse
Should Win: Muse

British Single
The Hoosiers - 'Worried About Ray'
James Blunt - '1973'
Kaiser Chiefs - 'Ruby'
Kate Nash - 'Foundations'
Leona Lewis - 'Bleeding Love'
Mark Ronson - 'Valerie' featuring Amy Whinehouse'
Mika - 'Grace Kelly'
Mutya Buena - 'Real Girl'
Sugababes - 'About You Now'
Take That - 'Shine'

Actually, re-assesing the list slightly 7 of them are actually quite a decent jobs. It should go to Nash, 'Foundations' is as brittle and brilliant and bittersweet as you'll find anywhere. Probably go to Leona though...this is a public vote, and she's good at them.

Will Win: Leona Lewis- 'Bleeding Love'
Should Win: 'Foundations'
Awol: Manic Street Preachers- 'Your Love Alone Is Not Enough'

International Male Solo Artist
Bruce Springsteen
Kanye West
Rufus Wainwright
Timbaland

Can anyone bring themselves to care?

Will Win: Kanye
Should Win: Rufus! Rufus! Rufus!

International Female Solo Artist
Alicia Keys
Bjork
Feist
Kylie Minogue
Rihanna

See above.

Will Win: Rihanna
Should Win: Bjork

International Group
Arcade Fire
Eagles
Foo Fighters
Kings Of Leon
The White Stripes

Predictable the best bunch of the crop, although who thought putting Eagles here was going to work? Dad's everywhere will approve, perhaps that's the point. They have tickets at the O2 to sell after all.

Will Win: Foo Fighters
Should Win: Arcade Fire
Awol: Dresdon Dolls

International Album
Arcade Fire - 'Neon Bible'
Eagles - 'Long Road Out Of Eden'
Foo Fighters - 'Echoes Silence Patience'
Kings Of Leon 'Because Of The Times'
Kylie Minogue - 'X'

See above franly. Foo's album was surely too weak to see them through this though? Especially against KoL/Arcade Fire?

Will Win: Arcade Fire - Neon Bible
Should Win: Arcade Fire
Awol: White Stripes- Icky Thump.

Outstanding Contribution Award
Paul McCartney

Poor thumbs-aloft, eh? He could have won this any year since they started it, and when do they give it to him? In the year he actually sells enough records and does enough to warrant both a best album and a best male nomination. Instead they give him "irrelevant as a recording artists but used to great" award (appropriately given to Oasis last year). It's hard to think of anyone more worthy of an outstanding commitment to music award, but it still feels a little late coming. One of the proper awards would have een a much more fitting tribute. Still, may as well get it over with while he's still with us.

WIll anyone actually bother to watch this year?

Jim Davidson is offensive. ITV are not.

2008-01-14T09:47:00.000-08:00

Cockish alcaholic and homophobe Jim Davidson may have said some offensive things on Hell's Kitchen, but OFCOM have ruled that ITV was allowed to show them, say Media Guardian. And quite right too. The more people who get to see what an utter utter tit the man is the better.

Brian Dowling is a hero for being the first ever openly Gay Kids TV presenter in Britain. He's also had a bad time lately, with the Golden Globes being cancelled and all.

Where as Jim Davidson is a shitbag who gives Star Trek fans a bad name.

And isn't funny. Ever. And you laugh at his jokes, that means you must hate Gays too. Or clearly insane, like Teresa Young.

He's not the messiah etc etc

2008-01-14T06:29:00.000-08:00

Joining the Amanda Palmer and Flight of the Conchords albums in a list of “things we’re really looking forward to in 2008” is Chris Morris’ directorial debut. According to the Sunday Times, the film is about the innate ridiculousness of terrorism, and according to us in likelihood will bulldoze through a wall of dearly held taboos, inflame the Daily Mail (again), and of course be very very funny.

According to slick-haired one behind BrassEye, The Day Today and Nathan Barley:

“There is this Dad’s Army side of terrorism and that’s what this film is exploring…This film will hopefully get over that terrorists do what we all do, they discuss the mundane, and plan things that sometimes then go wrong. People, that is viewers, are longing to laugh at terrorism.” (Sunday Times)

He’s probably right as well. It worked pretty well in Team America: World Police. Morris will apparently direct, but not star in the film. And with the closest thing British comedy has to a living genius behind the wheel, this could very well be our generations Life Of Brian.

Friday Night TV Review

2008-01-14T03:57:00.000-08:00

Long gone are the days of Friday being the flagship comedy night for all television everywhere. BBC2 have abandoned their comedy output all together. Only Channel 4 still take the once hallowed evening seriously, and even they no longer have the sheen that used to scream EVENT! when Spaced, Father Ted and new episodes of Friends would debut. In fact with the lack of focus, we spent the evening flicking between BBC1 and ITV1, a fact the 16 yr old me would have been agog at.

Still, what’s becoming a continual delight is Jennifer Saunders’ Jam and Jerusalem, currently keeping what will always be thought of as the “Fools and Horses” slot warm until the Beeb shits out another series of My Family. It’s witty, it’s warming, Sue Johnston is wonderful, Jennifer herself keeps mostly out of site but when she surfaces it’s to be waspish and brilliant, Dawn French clearly has a ball every time, and the more Mrs Doyle on telly the better.

ITV are wading in too, with the second episode of Moving Wallpaper, which will go down in history as a great-idea-done-badly or a fundamentally flawed attempt at originality. Either way there’s something to applaud in the attempt if not the execution. Avalon TV came back all guns blazing with Al Murray’s Happy Hour. Talking properly about this will mean a quick slip into the first person, so apologies for that in advance. I never used to like Al Murray much, I thought he was lowest-common-demonolater pap with no real jokes. I kind of beer-swilling Bobby Ball. Then I started working for Avalon (I don’t any more. Don’t hold it against me.) and went to see him do a warm up gig for 50 people in a tiny theatre. Virtually the whole thing was off the cuff, it was brilliantly witty, the man clearly has one of the fastest working minds in the business. I was genuinely impressed. When sticking to the material it all feels a little old, but when he lets fly, when that brain is allowed to work at full tilt, sieved through a character it knows back to front, Al Murray can really justify his popularity. His chat show is alas a little too much prep and not enough fly to really work well, and post-Parky if ITV are looking for a new flagship chat-king they need to look harder. But he does the job.

Of course it doesn’t really matter…as devoted as Murray’s fan base is (and trust me it’s both massive and a bit obsessed. I’ve seen the fan mail.) it was never going to contend with Wossy, whose BBC1 show overlaps for half an hour with the’ Guvnors. No doubt it will please many at the BBC to stick one to Avalon, particularly in the realm of chat shows. But when you get down to it there are few that can compare to Jonathon Ross anyway. In 2008 it’s the perfect chat format, and regardless of guests it’s always funny. That the guests themselves were all A-Grade or achingly hip (Tom Hank, Chris Rock, Hannah from Primeval, Reverend and The Makers) while Murray’s were all chat-show faithfuls of yesteryear (Barbara Windsor), irritatingly bland (James Blunt) or annoying tab-trash Reality TV nonsense (Cerys, Marc Bannerman) probably didn’t hurt either.

I miss proper Friday night comedy.

"Oi! Dave – Eton Lads’ is 300 miles"

2008-01-11T07:30:00.000-08:00

And just when you've been depressed by the British public, they cheer you up again.

David Cameron has been sent packing from Salford Lad's Club. Not that the local Torys seemed to notice.

That Joke Definately Isn't Funny Anymore.

2008-01-11T06:45:00.000-08:00

Good God! If anything can put a dampener on the Conchord-infused bubble of love surrounding us today it’s further evidence of the Great British Publics piss-poor taste in just about everything.

The BBC website is reporting that a poll conducted by onepoll has put Only Fools And Horses as the show the public most want to bring back, further proving my belief that Del Boy Falling Through The Bar is the zenith of comedic achievment in most peoples eyes. The full results are below.

1) Only Fools and Horses
2) Friends
3) Fawlty Towers
4) Brookside
5) Sex and the City
6) Buffy the Vampire Slayer
7) Monty Python
8) The Krypton Factor
9) Big Breakfast
10) Absolutely Fabulous

Honestly, when will people learn? Lets put aside the sacred cows in the top 3 for now and deal with the lower regions of the list.

Absolutely Fabulous
Really? Did anyone who voted in this actually see the revived version of Ab-Fab a few years back? It had lost all of its bite and its silliness felt over done rather than glorious. Besides which Jennifer Saunders is currently working on infinitely more interesting fare in the under-rated Life And Times of Vivian Vyle, and especially in the current series of Jam and Jereuselam, which has quietly become –thanks in no small part to Sue Johnson and David Mitchell- one of the best bittersweet comedies on TV.
Chance of a come back: probably for a special here and there.
Deserves a come back: Nope.

Big Breakfast.
An interesting one this. Breakfast telly is awful just now and Channel 4 have given up all together. In its day the BB was one of the best things on all week, especially in the Evans/Roslin and Vaughn/Van Outen hey days. The replacement show, Ri:se was dreadful from the outset, and the brave revamp proved the train had long since sailed. Saying that, what’s on instead? GM:TV has its steady Mumsy viewership, but its yucky. BBC1 do a visual version of the Today Programme that isn’t as good, and C4 themselves just show Friends.
Chance of a come back: Unlikely
Deserves a comeback: If it’s done right it could work.

The Krypton Factor
Let’s not dwell on this, as it’s not comedy. However it would make certain older sketches funny again.
Chance of a comeback: Fair actually.
Deserves a comeback: Why not?

Monty Python
I refer you to 1999’s Python Night.
Chance of a comeback: Unlikely. Plus TJ says it can’t be done.
Deserves a comeback: Something’s should just be left alone. Maybe a live show would be fun though.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Would probably work fine. Joss Whedon’s “Season 8” comic books certainly seemed popular.
Chance of a comeback: Maybe.
Deserves a comeback: Spose.

Sex And The City
Surely disqualified as there’s a film in production?

Brookside
I know, lets bring it back, right. Only, instead of just the show, they can do an E4 sister show where a fictionalised version of Phil Redmond –played by, oh I don’t know, Harry Enfield- can talk about the production. It’s genius, genius I tell ya.
Chance of a comeback: Nah.
Deserves a comeback: Nah

Okay, now we get to the meat of it…

Fawlty Towers
Again, somethings should just be left be. It was pretty much perfect, another series can only be a bad thing. The show was recently bought back as a corporate video. Oddly it’s not made its way into the public sphere.
Chance of a comeback: Well there’s a Divorce to pay for, and the BBC would pay for through the nose, so…maybe.
Deserves a comeback: Only on one condition. The only way it would work is if ITV re-do the Audience With Alf Garnet format from a few years back. An Audience With Basil Fawlty? That would be ace.

Friends
Friends, the perennially likeable collusus of modern comedy is probably the most influential TV show on the speech, habits and attitudes of young people ever. Maybe something so powerful shouldn’t be allowed back. Besides, it was all wrapped up quite well wasn’t it?
Chance of a comeback: Well, the cast are hardly doing well in films are they?
Deserves a comeback: Probably not.

Only Fools And Horses.
And you have to just release a weary sigh. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with Fools and Horses. Genuinely it was a funny show. But how many times can you reanimate it? Since going out of regular production in 1990 each progressive reanimation has been further proof of the law of diminishing returns. They managed to squeeze out one iconic moment in the Batman and Robin sketch, and making them rich was a nice way of closing it up, but it hasn’t had the magic, especially since Buster Merryfield died.
Chance of a comeback: Inevitably.
Deserves a comeback: Not on your life.

Still, just to show that not every format has been done and dusted here’s the That Joke Isn’t Funny Top Ten of shows that could and should be brought back:

1) Brass Eye
2) Shooting Stars
3) Big Train
4) Futurama (okay, it sort of is)
5) Alan Partridge
6) The Good Life
7) Red Dwarf
8) Fist Of Fun
9) The League Of Gentleman
10) My Hero. Only joking.

Note I didn’t mention Spaced. Some things are sacred.

Conchord Flies Again

2008-01-11T04:03:00.000-08:00

Occasionally a piece of news comes along that makes your soul glow, and you spend the rest of the day floating along in a bubble of simpering happiness, chirruping occasionally in a bemused and delighted expression of child-like joy.

Flight of the Conchords are making an album.

Okay, you might argue that given the success of their HBO series an album was unavoidable. After all they released one in 2002 already. Not to mention their Radio 2 series, which is well worth tracking down. Then there was the EP they released in August on Sub Pop, that’s been nominated for a Grammy. In fact if they hadn’t done an album is would probably be more newsworthy than the inevitable one that’s actually being produced. But still, let’s not ruin it. The fact that the label that released the first Smashing Pumpkins and Nirvana material are releasing a record from the best comedy-music project anywhere in the world is exciting enough.

Hopefully the album will be new material, as much like the position the Boosh were in before they started on their second series, most of the songs from season one have been knocking around in one form or another for years, good as they are. A reasonable guess would be the songs from the album will form the basis of those is Season 2, which begins filming later this year.

It’s actually harder to think of an album due out this year that we’ll be looking forward to more.

Lager and Live please Bar Steward

2008-01-10T08:36:00.000-08:00

Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps is a show it’s pretty hard to love, but for all its faults it gets a far harder time than it deserves at the hands of pundits and snobby comedy fans alike. It’s really not all that bad, and there’s generally a handful of genuine laughs in every episode.

That said, I’m not sure how wise bringing it back is, even with the added gimmick of that American TV-staple the live show.

Granted this could actually be a lot of fun, it’s almost certainly going to be the best episode of the new series and it does actually achieve the impossible: It makes 2 Pints… event television for the first time ever. There’s not many as can claim they saw that one coming. When Will and Grace attempted the Live show it was a hoot, which isn’t an adjective I use widely. I'm not 100% it's even an adjective,

It’s certainly hard to think if another current British Sitcom that could make use of the live format. Possibly The IT Crowd could pull it off. For it’s faults 2 Pints does have a sense of barely held together anarchy.

That said it’s hard to see how it deserves yet another series, Live or not. Despite the likeable cast and aforementioned couple of strong laughs per episode, 2 Pints is patchy as hell. Half the things attempted don’t work, and every conceivable format twist has been thrown at it already. What’s more the stuff brought in to make it more interesting has all been nicked from other sitcoms. There’s been a musical episode (Scrubs), they killed the entire cast in the last episode (The Young Ones), now the live episode (Will and Grace). There’s nothing left to try. They can’t take these characters anywhere else, something that someone has clearly acknowledged: Ralf Little (whose sensibly jumped ship)’s character Johny has been written out by going on a ‘Shark Jumping Holiday’. That’s probably the best gag of the series right there.

Still. That cast is very likeable, even if you can’t ever remember that they’re characters aren’t called Jambo, Carol and Are’Antnee. At least it keeps Susan Nickson from writing another series of Grownups, which was shudderingly bad. Personally I won’t be happy till Sheridan Smith is put in Doctor Who properly though, and this just takes up her time until that day.

The first episode of the new 2POLAAPOC (as it shall now be called) is on this Sunday (Jan 14th)at 9.00p.

Here’s the trailer.

Ring Leader of the Tory Mentors

2008-01-10T05:41:00.000-08:00

Dough faced Tory Godhead David 'call me Dave' Cameron is messing with the minds of decent people everywhere by talking about The Smiths again.

You may remember a few years back he appeared on Desert Island Discs where he revealed that, quite annoyingly, he had a reasonable taste in the presentable side of vaguely alternative left-leading indie. We’re not talking anything earth shaking here, but when you find out a Conservative MP likes The Smiths and Radiohead it still jolts something quite fundamental inside you. It’s like finding out your Mum listens to Cannibal Corpse. It doesn’t fit with the way you see the world and how music relates to it. It’s a snobby view, but it’s human nature. Music snobbery is, after all, one of God’s greatest gifts.

Just to hammer the point home, having already proved his Radiohead credentials by persuading Thom and Jonny to play Fake Plastic Tree’s especially for him, he’s making the obligatory Smiths Fan pilgrimage to Salford Lads Club, where no doubt, like thousands before him, he’ll pose on the steps with a hearing aid and some gladioli.

The endearingly spiky Salford MP Hazel Blears is having none of it.

“People in Salford remember when the Tories were in power... I'm surprised he wants to visit a shrine so reminiscent of the 1980s - the dog days of Thatcherism” (BBC)

It’s true. It’s astonishing Cameron hasn’t thought of it. I know tact isn’t the Tory’s biggest priority these days (why else would they keep letting Boris Johnson out into the world?), but does he really think the people of Salford, of all places, will be pleased to see him? Let’s face it, the Manchester area has never been what you’d call Conservative heartland, and as Blears pointed out the bite of Thatcher was felt harder there than most places. People don’t forget that in a hurry. Cameron can hardly be unaware of his parties immediate legacy from their last run at the top. As new Lid Dem chief Nick Clegg says in today’s G2, Cameron was

“a foot-soldier for Thatcher.”

I wonder what Nick Clegg listens to?...Oh.
Nevermind.

Should we so surprised at Cameron’s allegiance to the other other Fab Four? Baring in mind Morrissey’s recently published views on immigration –which despite a lot of protest and clucking about being misrepresented by the NME, he never actually took back.

Are the leader of the Conservative Party and the indie elder-statesman gradually becoming the same person? It makes one shudder. As I live and breath, sir, you have killed me.

Madeline: The Movie

2008-01-09T03:39:00.000-08:00

The Madeline McCann film is a subject I can’t leave alone. Let’s ignore the fact the story was dismissed as untrue today (or at the very least the moral outrage caused someone to see sense) because it spoils things too much, and let’s ignore the murky morals of the McCann case, frankly it’s another blog all together which other writers have covered with more eloquence than I can currently be bothered to conjure this morning. The idea of Maddy: The Movie (as the tabs inevitably put it) is too irresistible a concept to not take further.

So, Thatjokeisntfunny productions proudly present the motion picture event of the decade. You’ll cry, you’ll quake with fear, you’ll shudder in disgust at the reactions of your own nation and it’s media. It’s a gripping tale of vengeance and plotting, with a spiral of twists each deepening the mystery. The best thing is, we don’t even know how it’ll end yet.

Ladies and gentleman we present: MADELINE!

Oh…hang on…

Better rethink that.

Ladies and gentleman we present: Pretty and Missing: the McCann Story.

From blockbusting Director Michael Bay

Staring

Robert Linsey………………………..Gerry McCann
Jill Dando………………………..Kate McCann
Sean McCann as himself
Amelie McCann as herself
Wendy Richard………………………..Jennifer Murat
Al Murray………………………..Robert Murat
Sean Hughes………………………..Dr Russell O’Brian
Gillian Taylforth………………………..Jane Taner
Matthew Kelly………………………..Dr Matthew Oldfield
Kaye Adams………………………..Rachel Oldfield
Nicolas Lindhusrt………………………..David Payne
Letitia Dean………………………..Dr Fiona Payne
Pauline Quirk………………………..Diane Webster
Antonia Banderas………………………..Lieutenant Colonel Costa Cabral
Ian McShane………………………..Chief Inspector Olegário de Sousa
Benicio De Toro………………………..Miguel Matias
Cheech Marin………………………..Sergey Malinka
Dany Trejo………………………..Carlos Pinto de Abreu
Anna Friel………………………..Justine McGuinness
Paul Whitehouse………………………..Pinto de Abreu
Julia Sawala………………………..Jacqui Smith
Dexter Fletcher………………………..Gordon Brown
Patrick Kielty as himself

Alan Dale………………………..Rupert Murdoch
Martin Brunt as himself
David Tennant………………………..Alípio Ribeiro
Mark Berry………………………..José Cunha de Magalhães e Meneses
Dave Longley………………………..Luis Bilro Verão
Richard Fleeshman………………………..Anjos Frias
Nigel Planer………………………..Clarence Mitchell

And introducing Madeline McCann as herself.

*please note Thatjokeisn’tfunnyanymore hopes for the safe return of Madeline McCann to her family. We don’t want to get into the shit over this. Unless they did it of course, in which case she's probably better off without them.

Young Voters take heed

2008-01-08T09:39:00.000-08:00

Vomit inducing right-wing wank merchant Richard Littlejohn has described PM Gordan Brown as having a "Kiddiefiddler grin". This is possibly the only sensible thing the smug shitbag has said in his entire career to date, if somewhat hipocritical.

Still...it's really just stating the obvious.

The Old Curiosity shop

2008-01-08T05:00:00.000-08:00

Last night saw the recording of the first episode proper of The Museum Of Curiosity at the Pleasance Islington. I went along with fellow Comedybox troopers Bob and Ben, not actually knowing much of what to expect. The show's being co-produced by Dan Schreiber, whose also my immediate boss at Comedybox.

It's a great conceit for a show actually, being a spin-off of sorts for QI, whose producer John Lloyd is chairing here. Not your classic radio panel game, The Museum works as a kind of Room 101 in reverse, for heavy weight intellectuals. John chairs the whole thing with Klingon musical genius and comic leviathon Bill Bailey as co-presenter and comic foil. The panel's made up of three brainy-types who each suggest an item (real, conceptual or non-existant) of curious and interesting value to be placed into the 'Museum'. The panelists wax lyrical on their various disciplines, and John tries to keep the whole thing on topic, and Bill tries to keep it funny.

It's a brave idea actually. This isn't a straight comedy show, although it was in places very funny. No was it a debate show, a science forum and a lecture, though occasionally felt like all three. Much like Badiels Heresy, it's a show that could go in any direction. I'll be very interested to see what comes out of the edit, and where the emphasis will be placed.

Afterwards Bob and I chatted briefly with guest Dr Jonathon Miller, a man of such mind-blasting knowledge that any and all people in the immediate area imediantly feel childish and thick. I certainly did. He gives the impression of tolerating you, not in an impolite way, just with the air that he probably would have better things to think about, but right now he'll alot part of his huge brain to pay attention to you. Of course I wanted to talk about Peter Cook, Beyond The Fringe and the Secret Policemans Ball, but kept pretty schtum as he was happier to talk about biology and how Autism has become a trendy subject. I felt I could bring something to this, but held back as I had the impression everything I could possibly mention will already have been pulled apart in that old mans brain. Someone I felt glad to have met, even if I couldn't get over the fact he looks a bit like Anton Egon in Ratatouille.

Equally I was glad to finally meet John Lloyd, who is essential to the Comedybox project, but whom I haven't met. When talking to someone like John it's difficult to switch your brain from all the things you immediatly associate with them. The fact that I have been able to quote huge parts of Black Adder Goes Forth since I was about 10 and played George in a school assembly version of the final episode when I was 14. The fact that I know Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy inside out. But you don't mention these things, you concentrate instead on the conversation in hand, you try to sound like you know what you're doing, and you try desperatly to not drink too much.

A curious night.

I believe the first episode of The Museum of Curiosity comes to Radio 4 in Febuary. I'll keep you posted.